Friends With Benefits
by Chaobaby95
Summary: Whether this was a friends with benefits with no strings attached agreement or not, Ash did not care, because he loved it all.
1. Chapter 1

**Friends with Benefits**

_There's just one life to live, and there's no time to wait, to waste, so let me give your heart a break._

* * *

This was the life.

Loud music pumped into the raven-haired boy's ears as he drank some unknown drink that the bartender offered him to cool down his headache.

It wasn't helping. But he drank it anyway because it tasted good and it made him feel numb in a way.

Ash Ketchum is now twenty years old, and had a girlfriend of one year. That girlfriend was Misty. As some people would say, they _finally_ got together! Fewer people thought, however, that Ash was gay. He scoffed at them.

'_I'm not gay!' _He would yell at the curious bystanders. He loved Misty, and that was that.

Then _why_ did he feel like this?

Sure, Misty and Ash were great friends from the beginning, after their rough start with the bike incident. Their friendship blossomed more and more, and after Ash finished his pokémon journey in Unova, he decided to take a break from training and just move on in his life. He was nineteen at the time and as he saw more and more young trainers, he started to get embarrassed.

And it was also embarrassing for him for trainers to ask how old he was. Most people thought he looked fifteen at the least. Ash raged against them and yelled, '_I'm nineteen!'_

Unfortunately, his height hasn't changed ever since he turned fifteen. He was still a rough 5'3 and his voice only went down an octave deeper. Only by a little bit.

He was now twenty and he _hated_ being short and _loathed _at how his voice still sounded like a young teenager. He was basically an adult now. And every time he tried to make his voice sound deeper, people looked at him weird. So he stopped doing that, and had to suck it up with who he was.

Sighing, he asked for the unknown drink again, wanting to be drunk and to forget life for a while. Even for just a moment.

"You okay, kiddo? Maybe you should stop drinking if you're here alone," the bartender asked, hesitant to pour him another drink. He already had four, but he wasn't too drunk.

Ash's left eye twitched at what the bartender called him. Kiddo. Ignoring his concern, he replied, "Yes. I'm fine, just please pour me another drink. What are you serving me anyway?"

"A mimosa. They're not too strong alcohol-wise but you drank four already, this being your fifth. But whatever floats your boat, kid."

He inhaled sharply at the 'kid' part.

"I _should_ be asking for your license. But I'll let it slide this time."

Thank God for that. He was only one year under the age limit for alcohol, but it didn't matter to him. He'd only got drunk once, and that was a mistake due to peer pressure. He was sixteen at the time and he was surrounded by people holding cups of beer while he was the only one drinking Sprite.

So of course he felt awkward and drank just a little too much beer. And gave him a pounding hangover the next morning. Oh well, he just shrugged it off and thought he won't make the same mistake ever again.

Wrong.

Ash just shook his head and drank his mimosa out of the champagne class, going a little more slowly this time. He admired the citrusy taste along with the alcohol and wanted to savor every moment of it.

Boy, was he going to get yelled at by Misty for being at a bar and drinking and being out so late.

But that's all they've been doing. Fighting and nothing else. He doesn't even get sex. Misty was the type of girl that wanted to wait for _the perfect moment._

'_Yeah, well I'm a boy. I have needs, you know. Screw you.'_

He shook his head again and was going to take another sip when he heard some kind of commotion near him.

"You shouldn't treat girls like this, you know! We have feelings! You can't just wiggle your way into my pants and then afterwards just leave me in your own dust! It doesn't work that way! And wipe that goddamn smirk off your face!"

"Well, sorry, but I'd thought you'd be smart enough not to open your legs every time you see some hot guy walk in the club. Again, thanks for the compliment."

"_What?!_ Gary, you motherf-!"

"Good riddance!"

Gary? Gary _Oak?_ No. Not possible. He hasn't seen Gary Oak in five years. The last time Ash saw him was in Sinnoh, and he was doing research. Of course he kept up his arrogant attitude around Ash, but sometimes he was nice. Only sometimes.

That voice sounded like Gary, but it couldn't be. No way. He kept on drinking his mimosa and ignored it.

"Can I have some beer? What kind? Oh I don't know, do you have Corona Extra? Yes, I'll have that with lime please, thanks."

'_Oh my God, it really is Gary_.' Ash could recognize that voice from a mile away. He just shrugged it off at first because maybe he was getting drunk.

But nope. It was loud and clear.

'_Shit shit shit shit._' He repeated in his head. He tried his ever so best to just slightly turn away from his rival. He started nibbling on the rim of the champagne glass. He did _not _want to deal with Gary right now. No way in hell. Nope. No way.

"Kid!"

He nearly jumped ten feet from his seat when the bartender shouted at him. He let out a measly "yes?"

'_Fuck.'_ Gary definitely knew Ash was there now. Great going, mister bartender. Awesome.

"Did you want another glass of mimosa?"

"Uh, y-_No."_ No. He had to leave. To stay far away from _him_.

The bartender looked at him weird. He shrugged it off and thought he was probably drunk by now.

Ash wanted to get up and leave the club. But he couldn't. He could feel his eyes on him. Like his eyes were gluing him to his seat. Ash felt really nervous. And he couldn't explain why. He hasn't been nervous around Gary before. But maybe since it's been five goddamn years since they last saw each other, he was afraid of what his rival would say.

'_Why should I care?_' He asked himself. He tried to get up from his seat, but it was seemingly hard to do. But he attempted to get up and stand on his two feet. Score!

But then he walked right into him. Because apparently when Ash got up, he got up as well.

Ash looked at him, and wanted to yell at him, but nothing came out as Gary Oak stood in his way. With that snobby smirk and those enchantingly green eyes of his. And Ash became scared.

"Well, well, _look_ who it is. I would've never imagined you in a place like this, _Ashy-boy."_

His heart went up to his throat at the sound of that _goddamn_ pet name. He always hated it when he called him that. It made it sound like they were gay and going out as a couple.

Or maybe he was over-thinking that.

"U-Um…hi Gary," he talked, cringing out the sound of how _weak_ he sounded. He contemplated on using his fake, deeper voice, but then Gary would know and he would make fun of him for that.

The older boy sniggered at his junior. "Surprised to see me, eh Ash? What has it been, five years? Too, too long…Don't you ever keep in touch?"

At that moment, Ash felt bad. They _were_ friends, but…but still. It was _Gary._

"I…I'm sorry, I just, I was busy. And I figured you were too."

"Yeah, I was for a while. But then things started slowing down and nothing new was coming up, so gramps decided to give me a break."

"Huh? So that means you don't work in Sinnoh anymore?"

"Nope, I figured I should work from home. Honestly, I was getting a little homesick, and grandpa's not getting any younger."

'…_How long…has he been home?'_

It's like Gary read his mind. "So yeah, I've been home for a good couple years now. I heard that you quit training. What's up with that?" He asked, sitting down afterwards to drink his beer.

Ash also sat down, he was feeling a little overwhelmed from both Gary and the alcohol in his system. "Yeah, I decided I was getting too old for that stuff and just stopped."

"Too old? Oh, that's right, you're twenty now…"

Oh, great. Now Gary doubted his age. He rolled his eyes, "Gary. You've always been a year older than me. Don't tell me that you're doubting me."

He smirked once again. "Well, I don't know, Ash. You've never seemed to reach the puberty department."

It took everything for Ash not to bite his tongue off. "I've grown plenty, thank you!"

"Yeah, maybe your temper. But you're still that short, squeaky voiced Ash that I've always known."

"What?! I'm not squeaky voiced! Okay, my voice has gotten way deeper than it was before!"

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Ashy-boy."

He growled at his counterpart, his heart burning with rage. Ash never knew why Gary could always get under his skin. Everything he says always has some arrogant edge to it and it makes him mad. And he realized that Gary will never change.

The brunette smiled deviously, taking another swig of his beer. "Well, that's not a pretty face. You've never changed, Ashy."

"I can say the same about you!"

"Well thanks for the compliment," he sarcastically replied, finishing his beer and now nibbling on his lime.

He was about to remark, but then his pokégear buzzed against his jean pocket. He frowned and looked at the caller ID.

It was Misty.

'_Shit, I'm fucked.'_ He debated on returning the call or not. He was already mad and he didn't want to take out his frustration on her.

He sighed and turned off the pokégear. He'll just deal with her later.

Gary arched an eyebrow. "Who was that?"

"It's none of your business."

"Aww, come on. Was it your mom? Are you still living with her?"

His heart ached in pain and misery when he heard 'mom.' Gary noticed the sudden change of mood. And Ash knew he noticed.

"I don't want to talk about it. It was just Misty."

Gary gulped, the sourness of the lime running through his throat. Obviously something happened to his mom, and he didn't know it. But he decided to keep away from that topic for now.

"Misty? So you kept in touch with her then?"

"Well, she came and visited me after she heard I was back. So we kinda just kept in touch ever since then…"

"Hmm, well a little birdie told me that you two were going out. Is that true?"

Ash was silent. He honestly didn't know the answer to that question. He just decided not to respond and started fidgeting with his thumbs.

Gary could read him like a book. "So you two are having trouble then?"

"What the…Gary, are you some kind of psychic? Do you have Alakazam somewhere that's telling you whatever's on my mind?"

The brunette laughed at the confounded boy. "You're too easy to read, Ash."

Ash scowled at the man before him and turned to face the bartender to ask for another mimosa. Gary asked for another beer as well.

While they were waiting for their drinks, Ash kept secretly looking at Gary, who was still nibbling on his lime, and pondered at how much he's grown.

He was taller than Ash, by quite a few inches, like he's always been. His shoulders grew nice and broad, and he kept his lean and fit frame. He's also earned some muscles on his arms as well as his legs.

'_He must've done a lot of field research…' _Ash thought as he travelled his eyes to his head, noticing that he grew his hair out again and it was in a wild state and – did it seem darker? Ash shook his head. It was probably just the lighting in the club.

Then he met his eyes. His beautiful, wondrous green eyes. The same eyes that always took his breath away no matter what. He didn't even notice that Gary was staring right back at him.

He gasped, noticing what he just did, and realizing that his heart is now beating a mile a minute. He finished up his mimosa quickly and walked out of the club, not looking back.

_**XX**_

His head still buzzed with confusion and excitement as the alcohol was still taking over. He kept thinking about Gary. He kept seeing those eyes. That hair. And he kept hearing that _voice._

He tried everything to keep Gary out of his mind. He even tried the 'out of sight, out of mind' thing back at the club when he suddenly just got up and ran. But that didn't do shit. When he got home, he played video games, drank more alcohol, and took a nap that lasted five minutes, but nothing could get his own rival out of his mind.

Absolutely nothing.

His eye twitched and he rubbed it to make it stop. He stepped outside in the crisp air, and even though it was two in the morning, he could already smell the dewy grass. He loved that smell.

Gary smelled like that sometimes.

'_Fuck! I can't get him out of my mind no matter what I do!' _

Ash groaned silently and started walking on the sidewalk, not really paying attention to where he was going or what he was doing. He tried to make his mind go blank by focusing on things that surrounded him. The trees were slowly turning to their autumn colors, stars blanketed the night sky, and the air was silent.

He was starting to get dizzy from the alcohol, and suddenly, every object were in twos, so he shut his eyes tightly and opened them again, trying to get them adjusted. But he realized he was in a different area. He was in front of a house, not his own though. It was so familiar though.

He heard a door open but his vision was getting dark and blurry, he couldn't see anything. Everything he heard sounded far away too. He could hear someone calling his name, but he couldn't pinpoint who it was.

Suddenly, he felt cold and wet. Actually, _very _cold.

He gasped and coughed out water that went into his mouth unexpectedly. He was soaking wet, his skin forming goosebumps.

"Have you finally lost it, Ash?"

"Ah!" That voice again. It was him again. Then his vision came back and realized that he was in Professor Oak's house. In his bathroom. And in the tub half-naked with only his boxers on.

And Gary was _right there._

Ash blushed furiously and pushed his rival out of the way so he could grab a towel to cover him up.

"Gary! What…What am I doing here? And why am I half-naked!?"

"Well, you walked in the house like you owned the place, and then you start babbling nonsense about what you did today or whatever, so I figured you were completely out of it, so I stripped you out of your clothes and threw a bucket of cold water over your head to snap you out of it."

Ash was dumbfounded. _'When did I…do all that? I don't remember _anything…'

Gary smiled and shook his head. "Listen, why don't you just go lay down and I'll fetch you some water and some aspirin."

The raven-haired boy looked at him, and he then realized how tired he was and how his headache got even worse. He nodded, letting Gary lead him to his bedroom. The brunette lent Ash one of his shirts to wear to bed so he wouldn't be cold.

Ash blushed. _'Gary's being so nice to me now…I swear he's some sort of paradox or something. Mmm, this shirt smells so good…'_

Ash settled himself on the ever so cozy bed and tried to regulate his breathing. Gary returned with a glass of cool water and aspirin. The younger boy also noticed that his senior changed into different clothes, into a white t-shirt and blue sweatpants.

He looked away. _'Out of sight, out of mind…'_ he chanted in his head. But then he stopped as soon as Gary sat next to him. He was pretty close to Ash, and he brought him even closer when he wrapped his arm around Ash's shoulder.

"So, sounds like your life is pretty messed up."

Ash looked at Gary again, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well, when I said when you talked to me about what you did today, I was lying. I didn't want to tell you the truth until you got yourself settled. You told me that you and Misty are fighting, you haven't seen your Pikachu in a while, and that your mom's moved out of the house."

'_I told him all of that…? Well, that's just great.' _Ash sighed. "Sorry, I…I didn't mean to throw my troubles against you like that."

Gary smiled sincerely. A smile that Ash hasn't seen in a long time. "It's okay. You just need a nice rest away from everything."

'_Ain't that the truth…'_

Ash finished his glass of water and set it on the bedside table. His headache was finally decreasing, and he realized that he was very snug and warm against Gary's chest. His heart was racing against his chest, and it almost hurt.

'_Why do I feel this way for Gary…? Shouldn't I feel this way for Misty? It's her I love…right?'_ But he wasn't so sure.

"Yeah. My life's pretty screwed up right now," Ash admitted.

Gary just chuckled. He squeezed Ash's shoulder and pulled him closer.

"I just don't know what to do…"

Gary's hand wandered down to his waist, and mentally smirked when he felt him shudder. His lips moved toward the junior's ear, whispering huskily,

"_Then let me make all of your troubles go away…"_

_**XX**  
_

A gasp emitted from Ash's throat as Gary devoured the younger boy's arousal, slowly drawing it out before he sucked it back in.

How Ash got into _this_, he has absolutely no idea. All he remembered is that he somewhat agreed for Gary to cast away his troubles, but to do something like _this?_

Strangely, it was working as Ash hesitatingly but confidently gripped his rival's wild hair, pushing him deeper. It just felt _so_ good, and everything felt numb. This was better than being drunk, Ash thought.

Sure, he was cheating on Misty, and what they were doing was very, very wrong.

But at the moment, Ash did not care.

The raven-haired boy closed one eye tightly as his shuddering orgasm came, releasing himself fully into the brunette's mouth. And he swallowed it all. And Ash loved that.

Whether this was a friends with benefits with no strings attached agreement or not, Ash did not care.

* * *

**Hehe, don't worry guys, there will be a LOT more steamy action in the upcoming chapters! I'm a little rusty on writing Palletshipping and yaoi since I'm used to writing hetero stuff xD, but I'll try my best for you guys, so please review your thoughts on the plot so far! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

_But to lose all my senses, that is just so typically me._

* * *

"_Phone call, phone call!"_

The darker haired boy groaned as he woke up to the disgustingly bright sunlight and the loud ringing of his pokégear. He tried to reach for it while not moving in his spot because he was just _too_ comfortable to move. But unfortunately he couldn't reach far enough.

He groaned again as he moved about an inch towards the phone before trying again, but with no avail.

On the other hand, Gary just walked in the room, seeing Ash effortlessly reach for his pokégear, which was still ringing loudly. He was quite amused by the sight, but decided to give him some sympathy as well by picking up the phone and handing it to him.

"It's Misty. You better have a damn good excuse for not answering her phone calls the past hour."

"The past hour...? What time is it?"

"Almost noon."

"Almost _noon?!"_ Ash suddenly jolted up. The result was him falling off the bed and on to the ground, landing face forward.

Gary rolled his eyes at the clumsy and irresponsible boy. "I can't even fathom on how you two are still in a relationship, because _this_ is just ridiculous."

"Shut up, Gary!" Ash hushed him harshly before getting up quickly to sit on the bed safely and finally answering his phone.

"Ash? Ash!"

"Hi, Misty."

"Finally! You answer your phone! Do you realize how many times I called you? Where on Earth were you?"

"Um…I was at my house."

Gary rolled his eyes again at the poor boy. Obviously, everything he would say to Misty would be a lie.

"Really? I called your home phone there too, but you didn't hear it?"

"No…I was busy."

"Busy doing what?"

"Um…" Ash fidgeted in his mind, trying to find words to say, _anything_, just as long as Misty believed it. He looked at Gary, but he seemed preoccupied by something, staring at Ash with a weird sort of lust in his eyes.

"Well?" Misty's voice rang in his ear, bringing him back to life.

"I was…catching up with an old friend."

"Who?"

It was Ash's turn to roll his eyes. So, so nosy. "I'll tell you everything later, okay? I promise, I just need to wake up right now."

He heard Misty sigh over the phone. He felt bad about lying and not saying everything, but he just woke up and needed something to energize him.

"Okay. Don't forget though, we have a lunch date at Starbucks at 2:00."

"I know, I didn't forget. I'll see you in two hours."

"Okay, see you then."

"Bye."

He shut off his pokégear and put it away, and then plopped back on the bed. "And good night."

Gary chuckled, shaking his head. "You are such a bad liar."

"No, I'm not. I just won't tell her everything, that's all."

"Yeah, okay. By the way," Gary opened the door to leave the bedroom. "You _do _realize that you are still naked, right? I mean, you put on a full show for me while you were talking to Misty," he belched out his annoying laugh.

Ash was beet-red. "_Gary!"_

**XX**

It was now 1:15, and Ash was wide awake and dressed. He has to go back to his house to change into cleaner clothes, though, so as he finished putting on his shoes, he was ready to leave. He kind of hoped he wouldn't run into Gary on his way out, but at the same time he did. There was just something about his rival that made his nerves jump in a good way. Like the way he made him felt last night, when he was giving him a darn good blow-job.

There wasn't any kissing, or actually, there was nothing too sensual going on at all. It was just straight to the point, but Ash didn't mind, and by the looks of it, Gary didn't seem to mind either.

But he has no idea how this whole "friends with benefits" thing works. Was there any emotional attachment at all? Can they still be friends normally? And when the whole thing ends, will their friendship ever be the same? Ash couldn't tell if he got into some kind of huge trouble or not.

Gary was dependable, on most things. Ash thought maybe if the two talked it out, he would get a better understanding. He looked at the clock. He could kill some time. After all, Starbucks was only a ten minute walk anyway, and if he could spare at least ten minutes with Gary, there would be no problem changing clothes and getting there on time, right?

He walked downstairs and immediately saw Gary outside tending some pokémon on the ranch. He went outside and approached the brunette.

Gary looked over his shoulder and sniggered, "Finally decided to get out of bed, eh Ash?"

"Yeah…um, listen, I wanna ask you something."

"Hmm?" He meekly replied, not really paying attention at the moment.

"This…_thing_ we're doing…are there any rules? 'Cause I don't know."

Gary paused. "Thing? What do you mean?"

"You know… What we did last night?"

"Oh. So you want more from the great Gary Oak, then?" He winked, making Ash blush.

"I never said anything like that…I mean I don't know…"

"Well, if you make up your mind and you do plan to do the whole "friends with benefits" thing, then there are tons of rules, Ash. The type of rules to make sure nothing emotionally damaging happens between the two of us."

"Well then, fill me in."

"Well, we can't go on dates, we can't be clingy, we can't be committed into a real relationship, and we need to keep it a secret. No telling Misty or Brock or whoever you still keep in touch with these days. We can also set ground rules for whenever we're together but mainly I'm helping you through sexual healing until you sort things out, so I guess we can do anything besides the set rules for friends with benefits. Oh, and numero uno, the most important rule of friends with benefits, we cannot fall in love. Got it memorized, Ash?" Gary went back to treating the pokémon, leaving Ash in a dumbfounded state.

"Um, yeah…thanks. Uh, I gotta go now though. So, I'll see you later, maybe."

"Sure, I'll try and believe that," he smirked.

Ash sighed and left to his house.

**10 minutes later…**

"So guess who I saw this morning on my way to Starbucks," Misty inquired after taking a sip of her pumpkin spice latté.

"Who?"

"Brock! Apparently he's finished training and is a fully fledged pokémon doctor! He's back at his hometown in Pewter City and he contacted me. He says that maybe we can all get together later today."

Ash's mouth gaped upon hearing the name Brock. "Really? He's back? Gosh, I haven't heard from him in years…"

"I know, me either! Which is why it's essential that we all hang out today! Brock told me he has to go see Professor Oak first though, so is it okay if we stop by his lab?"

His heart jumped in his throat. _'Think of something now, Ash. Think, think, think…'_ "I don't think he's there today…"

"Professor Oak? He's always at his lab at some point."

Ash nervously squirmed. "Um, yeah maybe he's there now. I don't know."

"Wait, how would you know if he wasn't there or not? You told me you were at your house!"

Busted. _'Gary was right, I am such an awful liar…' _ "Okay, fine, I lied...I'll tell you everything. I was at the bar last night because I was frustrated with a lot of things, it wasn't just about you, I swear. Anyway, just as I was about to leave the place, I saw Gary."

It was Misty's turn to gape. "Gary _Oak?_"

"My reaction exactly," he grinned a little at Misty. "We caught up with each other and I saw him again today but I didn't see Professor Oak. Maybe he was inside somewhere else…"

"Oh…" Misty could only muster a few things from what Ash said, and she was trying not to be mad at him for lying but at the same time trying not to be so surprised that Gary was back in town. "So wait, what is he doing back?"

"Apparently, he got homesick and didn't wanna work in Sinnoh anymore, so he came back. It's been five years since I've last seen him, so it was really surprising. He was also a bit mad at me because I haven't really contacted him…"

"Well, it's the same with Brock though…well, maybe it makes more sense for Brock not to contact us, because a doctor _is_ always busy."

"Yeah, true…but he's not mad at me anymore so…" That was pretty obvious.

"Well…do you not wanna go to the lab then? We could just meet Brock at a place afterwards?"

"No, we can still go. It has been a while since I've seen Professor Oak too, so I better go visit him."

"Okay, then! In that case, we'll meet Brock there."

"Alrighty then," Ash sighed inaudibly. He hasn't made up his mind yet about seeing Gary or not ever again but that wouldn't be right. It was just so hard to picture Gary normally after that night. Ash could only remember how good it felt and he wanted to do it again so badly, and maybe even do more than that.

But he just wasn't sure yet.

_**XX**_

Ash's heart raced more and more as they approached to the lab. He felt like he was already there a couple minutes ago and he just couldn't stop thinking about last night. Ash was convinced that he definitely wanted more from Gary, and Gary alone.

"Hey, Ash? Are you sure you want to be here? I mean if you really don't want to see Gary that badly, we can always go when he isn't there," The red-head asked after noticing Ash's hesitation.

'_But he'll always be there.' _"No, I'm definitely fine. Misty, I can handle Gary, trust me."

She smiled and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "Brock said we can go in the ranch instead of ringing the doorbell."

They made their way to the ranch around the lab, and they saw a familiar sight not too far from them.

They both laughed, knowing who it was instantly and ran up to the elder and gave him a breath-taking hug. Soon after realizing who it was, Brock laughed along and hugged the two back.

"I can't believe it! Brock, it's really you!" Misty was the first to say something upon the reunion.

"I know, I can't believe it either! It's been years since we last saw each other. That was my fault though; I should've contacted you guys at least once."

"No, it's not your fault. You're a doctor now, and when a pokémon is in danger, you've gotta help it, right?"

"Haha, yeah I guess you're right, Ash. Wow, I still can't believe it. I couldn't even believe it when I met up with Gary and Professor Oak!"

"Oh, they're both here? Where are they?" Misty asked, anxious to see the professor.

"They're inside examining a Shiny Stone. They're still a bit rough on researching everything about the pokémon in the Unova region."

"Oh, I'd love to see them. Did they seem busy?"

'_Misty, shut UP, oh my God, you can always see them another time.' _Ash thought, obviously not saying it out loud. The more they mentioned Gary, the more excited he got. He needed to get away from this place right now.

"Nah, they should actually be done in about a minute. Ash, Gary says you two already caught up, is that true? I know you two haven't seen each other in a while either."

"Yeah, it's true."

"Are you guys still acting like rivals?"

Ash grinned a little. "Yeah, sometimes. Kinda reminds me of the good old days."

"Speaking of that, where do you guys wanna go after this?" The tallest asked, eager to spend time with his best friends.

"Hmm, I don't know yet. Oh, I think Viridian City has that new restaurant that just opened about a week ago. You want to go there?" Misty suggested, and the other two agreed.

"Aww, how cute, the original trio back together again," A familiar voice came from behind Ash, almost making him have a heart attack right there on the spot.

The raven-haired boy realized that it was always Gary's voice that made his skin jump.

"Oh, hi Gary," Brock greeted the rival with a smile, with Misty responding as well.

"Well, hello there, Misty. Been a while since I've seen you around."

"I know, how've you been?"

"I've been good. A bit busy, but I can handle it. What about you?"

"The same. It's not always easy being a gym leader with all these challenges coming out of nowhere. But it's always exciting nevertheless."

The four conversed about their lives a little bit, catching up with each other until another familiar sight came into view.

"Well, this is certainly a surprise!"

Both Misty and Ash greeted Professor Oak with a big smile, extremely happy to see the great renowned researcher.

"It's great to see everyone! It's very refreshing especially after a hard day's work."

Everyone else agreed. Again, they talked a bit before a very awkward question from Professor Oak came up,

"So, Ash, how's your mom? And Pikachu?"

The tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife.

Thankfully for the short boy, Gary cleared his throat, "Gramps, isn't there research you need to do on that pokémon, err…Genesect?"

"Oh! That's right, thanks for reminding me. Well I've got to go now, maybe we can catch up at a later time! Goodbye, everyone!"

Ash glanced at Gary, his eyes saying 'thank you.'

The brunette nodded and then said, "Well, I must be going back to my research too. You guys have your fun, okay? See you later!"

Ash exhaled deeply, trying to let off all of his weight on his shoulders. "Well, let's get going, then. We have a lot to catch up on."

_**XX**_

The new restaurant in Viridian, titled 'Ponyta's Outback' was so, so busy, but the food smelled amazing and the trio were enjoying their well-deserved steaks and baked potatoes.

"Hey, Ash? I know it was kind of uncomfortable back there, but it's been nagging me. What happened to your mom and Pikachu?"

Ash nervously showed a small smile, appreciating his friend's concern. "Me and my mom got into this huge fight...To make a long story short, basically I stopped depending on my mom for everything and we barely talked about anything. You knew how me and Mom were…we were like bread and butter.

"But as the years went by and I started losing contact with all of my friends, I kind of did the same with Mom as well. I never told her anything and it hurt her a lot. So her next decision was to move out of the house one day while I was sleeping, only leaving a note that said, _'Goodbye, tell me whenever you actually need me.' _And now only God knows where she is. As for Pikachu, I did the same exact thing like I did with my mom, and after she left, Pikachu left a day after as well. It's all my fault…" Ash's voice started to crack, but he held back the tears.

"No, it's not, Ash. I mean, everyone goes through changes," Misty assured him, trying to comfort him.

"Wow, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was that serious," Brock's voice saddened, showing deep concern.

Ash smiled at his friends. "It's okay. It's hard, but I try and be brave as the days go on. Plus, now I have you guys again…so it'll be all okay."

He tried to encourage them, but it didn't work. Soon enough, they just went back to eating their food.

_**XX**_

After brushing his teeth and taking a long, hot shower, he was so happy to finally rest his exhausted body on his inviting bed.

'_So many emotions today…I didn't think I was gonna live after I retold the story of my mom and Pikachu…and seeing Gary again today and he actually helping me out by not wasting my breath about them made me feel butterfrees' inside me.'_

And upon thinking about Gary again, it's like he's never left Ash's mind.

'_Here we go again…'_ Ash closed his eyes tightly. _'Just think about running through a meadow with mareeps and ledybas.'_

Again, nothing worked. This time, he gave up. He let his imagination run wild. He thought about Gary's voice, his eyes, his hair, his posture, his swagger, and just about everything else. He then imagined what it would be like to kiss Gary. He imagined what he would taste like and what his lips would feel like.

Then he found his way to the deepest, darkest secrets of his imagination. Secrets he would never tell anybody but himself. He could envision their silhouettes on a bed; he could distantly hear the moans erupting from their throats. Ash's bones would turn to mush when Gary would thrust into him.

Ash's eyes opened wide, as well as his mouth to catch his breath. And, with sudden ambition, he got up from the bed, not caring if he was in his pajamas, and walked out the door, out of his house and out into the crisp air. He power-walked to the lab, making it there in less than ten minutes, each step making him more anxious.

When he reached the lab, he opened the door like he owned the place, walked upstairs and started pounding, and even scratching at Gary's door since it was locked.

When the wooden door opened to reveal a confused Gary, Ash felt like he would burst from excitement and lust.

And with trembling lips, he kissed him right there and then.

* * *

**Hehe, sorry for the cliffhanger, but I just had to do it! Don't worry, the next chapter will be _very_ pleasing to the mind :D**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated! Have a great weekend too!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Make me scream, take me down, no one's watching; close your eyes, play it back and rewind._

* * *

Caught by surprise of his actions, Ash almost pulled away from the kiss, but Gary closed the gap once again and pushed him against the door, closing it in the process. The smaller boy let this happen and closed his eyes, clutching on the taller boy's shirt. It seemed that Gary pushed his body against Ash's, making him feel everything.

Ash moaned quietly in this state. He could taste and smell Gary's cinnamon essence, making him go weak in the knees, and when he literally did, the brunette's thigh brushed harshly against his sensitive spot, causing his moans to get more audible.

Gary smirked against the kiss before pulling away and then nibbling at his neck, his hot mouth burning against the skin and leaving a mark. He suddenly felt a more begging atmosphere around Ash as he noticed he was trying to pull his shirt off. He let him take it off and then Gary did the same.

They kissed again, and they noticed that it was neither sensual nor romantic; it was needy and hungry, especially for each other. And that was okay, because they both agreed they wouldn't be romantic with each other, they just wanted each other for sex alone.

And they were okay with that.

Ash's hands were shaking as he somehow successfully took Gary's belt off, getting frustrated that he was wearing jeans and that he would have to do so much work to get to the goddamn package. But before he could unzip the denim pants, Gary picked him up, causing the raven-haired boy to automatically wrap his legs around him. His hands moved to his torso, admiring the manly contours Gary possessed.

Ash felt himself being placed on the bed, the pillows comforting his head as Gary's kisses trailed lower and lower. His lips were sultry and so like silk, they felt so good against his skin. And then he felt something even more amazing. Gary's tongue ran across his rib cage area, where he was exceptionally sensitive, before reaching to his nipples.

The smaller boy let out a string of moans and groans as his senior's tongue abused the vulnerable area, switching from time to time. When his breathing became irregular, the older boy moved up to kiss his silky lips again.

Ash took the chance to finish his business with the jeans, unzipping it and removing them all the way, revealing his boxers.

Gary's kisses got deeper, his tongue probing Ash's lips for entrance. The younger boy was hesitant at first, but he let him and immediately his tongue met with the other's tongue. They were soon pulled into a lustful dance of kissing and while they were into that, Gary decided it was time to pull off Ash's pants, which was easy because they were pajama pants and they were quite loose around his waist.

He smirked when he felt something hard against his inner thigh. "Excited already, Ashy-boy?" He inquired jokingly.

Ash blushed furiously and had the sudden ambition to be in control. He pushed Gary onto his back while Ash placed himself in between Gary's legs unknowingly. Realizing what he did afterwards, he blushed even more, clearly noticeable and the brunette smirked at the sight.

That smirk always got him on edge and made him furious because he knew when Gary smirked, he was ridiculing him on the inside and felt like he was better than him.

Ash silently growled and kissed him again feverishly, gripping some stands of his voluminous hair.

Gary took the time to run his hands across the younger one's back, admiring how smooth it was, and he could feel all the bony curves on it. He was so skinny and so small, he was slightly afraid that he would rip him apart when they do the deed. But he wanted it so bad, and Ash clearly wanted it too, so he pushed that thought to the back of his mind for now.

It came to the point where Gary wanted to pull off his boxers, but due to the position they were in, it was kind of hard to do so. So they switched positions again with Ash back on the bottom.

Gary took a moment to stray away from Ash to look in his drawer for something; something very important so he wouldn't hurt his friend to the point where they had to stop.

Ash's look of confusion went away as soon as he saw that it was lubricant, and some of his nervousness went away. When Gary crawled back to his original position, he set the lube aside and started to remove his boxers, and unfortunately the nervousness came back.

Gary noticed the apprehension from Ash and smiled. "I'm not gonna laugh at you or anything. We're both boys, it shouldn't be a big deal anyway."

"Yeah, but…" he blushed. "I'm not exactly...anything special."

The brunette rolled his eyes. "Again, it doesn't matter. I gave you a blow-job, remember? You didn't seem to mind back then. And besides, I'm gonna be the one doing all the work."

Ash's eyes got wide as saucers and he could feel his whole face redden like a tomato.

Gary sniggered and did his business, removing the boxers and freeing the excited member. He wrapped his hand around it, feeling how hard it was already.

Ash couldn't help but let out a quiet groan. The brunette's hand was so warm and inviting and it almost calmed down all of his nerves. Gary moved his hand upwards to circle his thumb around the head and some precum came out of it already. Gary just had to taste it, just for a second.

The raven-haired boy moaned louder as he felt his welcoming mouth devour his girth. He could feel him suckling it like a juicy fruit, and he had resist every single urge to cum right there and then.

Gary pulled away slowly, making sure that Ash felt that excruciating tease. The younger boy's erection was almost painful and nerve-wracking at the same time. It gave him goosebumps all over and he just needed something to please him even more right now.

Gary could see it in his eyes. He removed his own boxers, showing that he was quite hard as well, and reached for the lubricant.

Ash tried his hardest not to let his nerves get the best of him, but watching Gary's every move, it just wasn't working. He knew for a fact that Gary would never hurt him physically, but when it came to something like this, there wasn't really a number one solution.

"Wh…Um…" Ash tried to say something, but nothing came out apparently, and that told Gary everything.

"Best you can do is to relax as much as you can," he informed him. He squeezed some lube out and rubbed it on his fingers. "And you kinda need to trust me."

He spread Ash's legs for better access and started gently circling around the sensitive spot, watching every motion and every facial expression he makes. Soon after, he pushed a single digit in, and felt Ash starting to tremble a bit.

It felt weird at first, for he was a virgin and new to this kind of stuff. Every breath he took was haphazard, and he felt like he couldn't relax no matter what he did. But at the same time it felt bizarrely good.

Gary pushed his finger a little further this time, but not hitting that certain spot just_ yet._ He needed to wait until Ash was fully ready to experience the feeling, but right now he needed to get used to this.

When Ash seemed comfortable enough, he added a second digit and took it slowly again before going a bit deeper.

Ash knew that this was only the beginning, that this was only the teasing part of it. He knew that Gary was quite experienced in bed and knew everything on how to please both a woman and a man. That's what made him so enticing and naughty and it made Ash give into him more. And just when he was getting used to that feeling, Gary's fingers reached that _spot_ and slowly experimented with it.

Ash's throat hummed out loudly before biting his bottom lip hard.

"Don't hold it in. No one's gonna hear you," Gary assured him. Ash could've sworn he heard a little growl emit from him as well.

"B-But…Ahhh!" He moaned a little louder this time when Gary pushed the prostate a little harder.

"Gramps is down at the lab, and he's probably knocked out by now. Plus the walls of the lab are heavy and there's no way you could make a sound loud enough to vibrate through those walls. But I could try," he winked.

He blushed for the umpteenth time that night, and he was already flushed by the time Gary added a third digit in, stretching him to the point where it felt amazing. He pushed his pelvis toward his fingers, wanting to go deeper and hit that marvelous spot again.

Gary went a little faster with his fingers, wiggling them from time to time since Ash seemed to like that, and sometimes he groped the younger boy's member so he would have to feel even more incredible sensations.

It came to the point where Gary's girth was getting painful from the sounds of Ash's mewls and he pulled his fingers away and started to apply lube to his sensitivity.

Again, Ash tried to stay calm, but the size and thickness of his girth was nowhere near in comparison to his three fingers.

"I…it…um…" Ash muttered nonsense again, but before he could say anything, Gary shushed him with a kiss. The poor boy was shaking and Gary had to think twice before doing anything.

"Are you absolutely positive you want this? Seriously, if you don't feel comfortable with this, then we can do it another time. Or if you don't feel comfortable at all, then we can just move on with our li-" Gary was cut off by Ash kissing him.

"I'll be fine. I can trust you," Ash replied, his breaths intermittent. His voice sounded unsure, but in a way he still wanted it.

Gary looked into his eyes for some time before realizing that Ash really did trust him. A glimmer shone in his green eyes before positioning himself before Ash, grabbing his legs and spreading them wider.

Ash tried to settle himself on the bed as much as possible, his head resting deep into the pillows, trying to block out the sounds of his pounding heartbeats.

Gary probed the entrance for a bit, trying to open and relax it as much as he could. Ash was a little resistant but he let him go through, going slowly inch by inch. Gary heard the younger boy groan a little in pain, and he even tried to move away, but the brunette shushed him and grabbed his hips attentively. It wasn't until he was halfway in that he realized how unbelievably _hot _and snug his walls were. So he took note right there and then to go a bit slower because Ash was a virgin, after all.

Ash also realized how thick Gary was and he could feel him throbbing inside of him. The intrusion was initially painful and it was still a little bit discomforting but just the feeling of his girth alone made him feel good otherwise. He noticed that the older boy's grip on his hips got firmer. It was as if Gary was trying to contain the beast inside of him from ravaging Ash inside out.

If only Ash knew how _much_ Gary had to hold in.

The brunette cursed under his breath as he finally thrust his sensitivity in slowly but fully. Now came the agonizing part of waiting until Ash was ready to move on.

The raven-haired boy couldn't find a single word to explain how he was feeling. The feeling of being filled inside with Gary's pulsating member was nearly enough to make him come right there and then. Ash gripped the bed sheets below him as he unknowingly tightened around the other's member, feeling every inch of it.

Gary was getting impatient already after a minute of feeling Ash's smooth walls constrict more and more around him and so he made his first move inside him. He went cautiously slow, but not too slow, but he got encouraged as a moan emitted from Ash. He then thrust in him again, then another. His pace was still gradual but his thrusts were deep.

Another minute passed, and Ash was tired of the pace they were going at. "Uhn, _Gary_…go faster."

The brunette smirked at the helpless boy before him before going quicker, Ash's moans becoming more audible.

The pain was completely unknown to Ash now and he just needed more and more. He tried wrapping his legs around him for more closure, but Gary's hands moved to his thighs and the grip was controlled. But then Gary noticed what Ash wanted, and changed position so that Ash's legs were on Gary's shoulders, and immediately the ever so sweet spot was hit over and over again, not giving him any mercy.

"Aah, oh my _god!"_ Ash felt completely vulnerable as his lustful feelings overtook him. He could barely even move his arms but successfully did so to grip the headboard behind him. He was almost on the verge of tears because it was almost too much to bear.

Gary didn't plan to ravage Ash but it was just too much: Ash's moans (which turned into quiet screams), the sight of his exposed body, his warm velvet walls, and him needing more just cancelled everything that Gary had planned for tonight when Ash first kissed him.

"P-Please, harder…!" And he followed his command, plunging harder into the defenseless young man, making him cringe from almost receiving _too_ much pleasure. His prostate was still being stimulated over and over again, Gary still not giving him any mercy.

Ash couldn't think, or actually he was thinking a million things, but he couldn't find a certain thought to ponder over. He felt intoxicated without the alcohol, except even better because there wasn't even any alcohol in his system. This totally beats going to the bar and having to listen to loud music and people. Just hearing the bed rock was enough for him. And Gary just graciously accepted this sexual time with Ash, even if it wasn't serious.

Hey, that's what friends are for, right? To be there for each other through thick and thin.

Gary looked down at Ash, and he saw that his face was in complete ecstasy. His body was so willing now for any pleasurable movements given. He looked down at Ash's member and knew he was close because it was completely covered in just his own precum. The brunette moaned as he let his animalistic instincts take over, hammering him, going as deep as he could, because he felt that he was close as well.

When the primal beast suddenly released from Gary, the younger boy practically thought he died and went to heaven. His moans were no longer moans, they were screams. At that point, neither of them cared if the whole town of Pallet heard them.

Ash came first, his back arching and grabbing the pillows to muffle his screams, and then he could feel Gary's hot liquid rush inside him, through his sultry, sore walls.

It took about a few minutes before they both finally calmed down. Gary carefully pulled away and plopped on the bed beside Ash.

'_Amazing,' _that was the word Ash finally came up with to describe the sex they just had. It wasn't the best word because he could probably use a more defined word, but amazing was from the top of his head.

Gary pulled the covers over both of them, and then turned away from Ash, settling into the mattress. Of course there would be no cuddling, at least not on the first night. That would count as being too clingy.

"Good night," Ash heard him say, and he couldn't help but smile.

"Night," he replied before settling on the bed as well. He pushed all the bad thoughts away to the back of his mind and let out a quiet, but contented sigh.

If this was what it took to make his troubles go away, then so be it because it was working like a charm.

* * *

Okay stop drooling xD I hope I did okay, I tried not to rush it but sometimes it got a little hard for me to do so xD

I wanna apologize for the month long wait, school just got really busy, I have projects popping out of nowhere plus tests and quizzes and even getting ready for college. PLUS, I finally have a job so I need to make money as well, hehe.

Also, my thoughts go out to the people who suffered Hurricane Sandy, I hope everyone is okay and recovering. I hear there's supposed to be a snowstorm though, so um...seriously? LOL i just want a normal white Christmas, not a Christmas where there's like thirteen feet of snow xD

ANYWAY, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and hopefully well worth the wait! Review your thoughts, and I hope you guys had a good Halloween too :D Even though Hurricane Sandy ruined it...thanks alot. lolol.


	4. Chapter 4

_Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it, so baby tell me what I got to lose._

* * *

The cool air woke Ash up from his comfortable slumber, and he shivered, feeling loneliness around him. Gary wasn't there and the dark-haired boy sort of wished cuddling was allowed in this sort of thing, for he could definitely use Gary's lean arms to warm him up.

He sighed as he got up and put on his pajamas, and thought that he should be getting back to his house by now. He forgot his pokégear as well, so Misty must've called him at least ten times. But it was nice not hearing his phone ring all the time. He needed some time to himself, or in this case, with Gary.

He stretched out his body and realized that his body was still a bit drawn out, and he blushed thinking about the intimate night they had last night. He wished he could replay that night every single time. When it would end, he would just rewind it to the beginning again. He just loved every aspect, especially when Gary lost control in him. And he just _loved _hearing his moans only because it was obviously unlikely for him to be audible in that sort of thing.

He realized he zoned out and shook his head before going any deeper in his imagination. He walked to the mirror and gasped at the _very_ noticeable love-bite on his neck.

'_Oh no. What if I run into Professor Oak and he sees THIS? Or what if Misty's waiting at my house and sees this?'_ His mind panicked and tried to create a plan on how to get rid of a hickey. Make-up? No, too obvious and this was Professor Oak's house. He tried combing his hair down, but it was still visible. He even tried to find a high-collared shirt in Gary's closet but there was none. Not even a special striped turtleneck sweater.

What kind of excuses could Ash make? _'I fell down and hit my neck with a rock.' _No, that makes no sense. _'I accidentally punched myself in the neck.' _No, that's too awkward. _'I ran into a sharp object that almost inserted my neck.' _Okay, now that's just plain stupid.

Ice? Ice! It wasn't the fastest solution to get rid of a hickey but hey, it was still early and he could still try to create a plausible excuse before he went back to his house.

Now to try and avoid running into Professor Oak…

He slowly opened the door, a creaking sound erupting making him flinch. He tip-toed as far as he could before finally making it at the end of the hallway. The kitchen was right there, literally within reach. But before he could step on the linoleum flooring, he heard a familiar voice from behind him, mentally groaning.

"Hi Ash! It's great to see you again after I left so suddenly yesterday," the professor made conversation, completely oblivious to the nervousness that was radiating from Ash.

"Y-Yeah! It's good to see you too. And it's not a problem, I guess we were all in a hurry," Ash replied, his hand covering the hickey, but he made it look like he was massaging his neck.

"Something wrong with your neck there?"

"Uh, not really, I just slept the wrong way and now I have a bit of a crick in my neck, so I'm just trying to massage it away."

"Ah, I understand. Oh, by the way, you're allowed to sleep over any time you want. Gary told me a little bit of what happened between your mom, Pikachu and you. I'm sorry that happened, Ash."

"O-Oh, it's okay…I'm sure it'll get better eventually…"

"That's the spirit! Well, I hate to run so shortly again but I must check on all of the pokémon and make sure they aren't into any kind of trouble. See you later!"

"Bye, Professor!" Ash walked the elder walk away to the outdoors before sighing in huge relief.

'_That was WAY too close.'_ Ash thought as he turned to walk into the kitchen, but instead walked into something, or some_one_.

"Don't you ever watch where you're going?" The brunette teased.

"Gary! I-I'm sorry. I just ran into Professor Oak and…" Ash suddenly blushed. "Do you know how close your grandpa was to seeing _this?!"_ He pointed at the love-bite.

Gary smirked. "Yeah. I basically heard the conversation. You don't make the greatest excuses, you know. Luckily, my grandpa never notices the small things unless he's really curious."

"Yeah, lucky for me," Ash scowled before realizing that Gary was holding a glass of water with two perfect ice cubes in it.

Gary noticed Ash staring at the ice cubes and thought of an idea. He gulped down the water, and then put one ice cube in his mouth. He then pushed Ash against a wall and quickly placed his cold lips against the hickey.

Ash gasped from the sudden coldness and movement from Gary. He could feel the ice slowly melting on his skin, as well as Gary's hot breath. His skin had goosebumps everywhere, and his crotch kept stirring. His hands held on to Gary's button up shirt, as if he was hanging on for dear life. He was seeing fireworks already, and he wanted his rival to pound into him over and over again for the rest of eternity.

Only Gary had the power to make Ash feel like this.

Ash started to mumble something, but Gary interrupted him with an almost ferocious kiss, him nibbling on Ash's lips. He accidentally dropped his empty glass of water, but thankfully the ground was made of carpet, and only the other ice cube was in it, so not a big mess was made.

The smaller boy ran his fingers across Gary's wild, but smooth hair, and he moaned against the kiss, trying to pull him closer. Their hot kiss melted whatever was left of the ice cube.

Gary couldn't resist. He picked Ash up by wrapping his legs around his waist, and carried him to the bedroom.

**XX**

"So Brock, how's it like being a pokémon doctor now?" Misty asked as she took a slow sip from her hot cocoa. Misty and Brock decided to hang at a café for a bit, to catch up more. The red-head called Ash many times, but with no answer, they just decided to spend a day without him.

"It's great! Nothing warms my heart more than being able to tend a pokémon back to health. When I see its happy smile when it feels better, that's when I know that I totally love my job, no matter how tough it gets," The former gym leader explained, a smile plastered on his face as he looked back on the times he healed pokémon.

Misty smiled as well. "Brock, that's great. I'm so happy for you! I knew you were set out to be a good breeder, but being a doctor is definitely your forte."

"Haha, thanks Misty. I appreciate it. You're still a gym leader, right?"

"Sure am! There's a lot more challengers now and sometimes it tires me out, but battling is so much fun, it makes up for it!"

"Oh, definitely! I sometimes have a battle here and there, and I remember my good old gym days. I miss those days often, but I'm content where I am now."

"Right!"

The man took a sip of his coffee before his face turned serious. "So, what's going on between you and Ash? Or even Ash in general?"

Misty sighed, "Sometimes I don't know what's going on with that guy. Some days he's perfectly normal and it's the Ash I know. But there are days where sometimes he just zones off. It's been happening a lot more recent now...actually, I recall him changing after his mom and Pikachu left."

"Hmm, that's understandable. He's probably in depression or maybe he's bipolar."

"Yeah…he even drinks now. One time, I remember he called me and he was completely wasted. I remember being so scared for him and also really mad at him. It's just affecting him so much, Brock…I'm still scared for him."

"Wow…he really has changed. I noticed it too when I saw him. He used to have a shine in his eyes…but it's gone now."

Misty sadly smiled. "I just wish there was some way to make him happy again. We do nothing but fight anymore. We'll probably break up soon. Honestly, though, I don't think I would mind. If it will make him happier, then so be it."

"Oh, Misty. Don't blame it on yourself, or how the relationship is going. You two always fought, it's in both of your natures," Brock warmly joked.

The red-head chuckled. "That's true. It's not all the time; I mean sometimes, he is happy. But then there are just times when he's just…not there."

"Right, I understand…"

The two sat in silence for a moment, sipping on their hot drinks. Then Brock thought of something.

"Say…why don't we try and find Ash's mom and Pikachu?"

Misty's sea-green eyes widened at him. "What? But Brock, Ash's mom has been gone for a year now! I mean, who's to say she's not in an entirely different region and never wants to come back? Same goes for Pikachu."

"Aww, come on Misty. They're not _that_ heartless. They've gotta come back sometime!"

"Well, you're right about that…I mean, we could try. It would make him really happy if we do find them."

"Exactly! So it's a plan then?"

She smiled with determination now. "It's a plan!"

**XX**

For what it seemed like forever, Ash finally left the Oak residence, still thinking about what happened in Gary's bedroom. He just couldn't explain it. He couldn't clarify how Gary knew practically all of his weak spots in just a short time. He could write a ten-page essay about how amazing his hands felt against his body. He could write a whole novel about Gary's enticing ways to make him feel like he was on cloud nine. And those lips. Oh, those wonderful, soft lips. He could kiss him over and over again and he would never get tired of those lips.

Ash's mind suddenly wandered off to Gary's features. Ash loved his brilliant smile, the one that made his heart melt. He loved his rowdy auburn hair, and it felt so soft when Ash stroked it with his fingers. And Ash knew he mentioned it in his own mind one too many times, but those _eyes._ Those beautiful green eyes. The only thing that Ash was convinced he could win in a contest against Gary was a staring contest, because he would never blink in front of those eyes.

Ash felt like he was in love.

Love.

Falling in love…or rather, falling on the concrete.

"Ow…" Ash rubbed his face, but thankfully there were no serious injuries. "Love hurts…wait a minute, didn't I just think that I was falling in love? With _Gary?"_

The coal-haired boy shook his head and stood back up on his feet. "No…I'm not. I can't be. That's not how it's supposed to be…"

Ash and Gary were not meant to be.

Ash and Misty were meant to be. That's how it is.

Ash stood in the same spot and stared in the distance. Slowly, he could feel his heart breaking.

But that's not how he wanted it to be.

**XX**

Gary changed into his comfy clothes as he laid down on his back and closed his eyes. He pondered about Ash, even if he didn't want to.

Ash was such a good person by nature, with a determined golden heart. His smile could light up the entire planet. Gary actually hated seeing him sad, even if he himself had made Ash sad. It broke his heart. He never apologized afterwards, but he wanted to, so badly. But that would make him look like some kind of sissy, and he wanted to keep up his tough guy attitude. But a part of him made him want to kiss his tears away and say sorry a thousand and more times.

Gary sighed and shut his eyes tighter, wanting to get rid of that thought.

Gary actually has had a crush on Ash for a long, long time. It was at the Silver Conference when he accepted these feelings, and declared himself gay. No girl could make him happy. In fact, nobody could make him happy, except for Ash Ketchum. And he hated and loved it at the same time. Ash could always make him laugh, especially when he was so dense about things.

After those long, agonizing five years of not seeing him, he had to control all of his happiness inside when he saw him that night at the bar. He wanted to kiss him with so much passion that night, but he couldn't, because Ash and Misty were together.

They could have sex and they could kiss all they want, but there was no feeling. Just lust.

He wanted to make that goddamn red-headed whiny bitch go away forever and have Ash all to himself. But Gary wasn't that cruel. He wasn't all-out nice either, but he was just himself.

He loved Ash so much it hurt.

But eventually he needs to rid of those feelings. Eventually he's going to have to suck it up and face reality. He couldn't have Ash. He _won't_ have Ash. It just can't happen. They were not meant to be. He knew that the friends with benefits is going to have to stop soon enough.

He needed Ash. But he can't have him, and it sucked. He opened his eyes, filled with anger and hot tears and threw a pillow across the room, hitting the wall quite hard.

'_But I can't stop loving him.'_

* * *

**Wooow, I'm sorry Dx I wanted to update so much sooner than this, but my life with technology sucks right now. My computer keeps freezing on me and won't let me write, and I seriously just wanna throw my laptop across the room. BUT TODAY IT WORKS AND I COULD FINISH THIS CHAPTER!**

**Okay, maybe I had some writer's block and laziness too...but mainly technology problems xD**

**Ahh, I hate writing conflicts in stories xD Poor Ash and Gary, huh? Hehe and there will more M-rated chapters coming up soon, perhaps even in the next chapter ;D**

**Please review your thoughts on the chapter! I'll try to work more frequently! Dx**


	5. Chapter 5

_I remember you said "don't leave me here alone," but all that's dead and gone and passed tonight._

* * *

Gary sighed as he roughly wiped away his tears. He gulped away the feeling of shame to the empty depths of his heart, where he could soon forget everything. He looked outside and saw that it was late afternoon already, the sun just resting before the horizon. Even though he just changed into comfy clothes, his instincts told him to go out for a brisk walk. The weather was comfortable and he needed to clear his mind.

He quickly threw on a pair of jeans and put on a light jacket and out he was. He followed wherever his feet felt like going. His emerald eyes fixated on the concrete below him, not looking ahead of him, but still being careful in his walk. The fallen, dry leaves made crunchy noises as he stepped on them. Weird as it sounded, he loved the sound of leaves being crunched – it was just a sense of peace in the air that he was only stepping on dead leaves of nothing, and not stepping over people that didn't even deserve to be stepped on.

One of those people was Ash.

He clandestinely felt bad about it, but he couldn't help it. It was by natural instinct to belittle him, to make him feel he was nothing compared to Gary. He was just so easy to rile up, and he loved seeing him mad and flustered, and he just had fun with it.

But eventually the fun went away as Ash sometimes broke down in front of him. He would hear his small, whimpering complaints about how maybe Gary was right after all, and that he would never be a good trainer like him. And Gary would have to swallow up the guilt and resist the urge to hug him and say sorry.

But for it being only a simple word, sorry was such a powerful word. And whenever he wouldn't say sorry when he had to, his heart just wallowed in a pool of disgrace.

And Ash definitely deserved a sorry from him.

The two friends/rivals have known each other since they were babies. Ash was always there right beside him, and he always knew how to put a smile on his face. And he was there the whole time Gary cried when his parents died.

Gary owed Ash his life, and his friendship.

The brunette growled and kicked a pebble to a random direction. Then he noticed his surroundings and realized he was at a familiar area, and he looked to his right to discover the Ketchum house.

He stared at it, closely observing the house. For the first time ever, he felt really, _really_ uncomfortable around the house. Before he used to always feel welcome, but now he felt empty. The house looked dead too, and the majority of the clouds rolled in the direction straight above the house. The garden hasn't been tended for a long while, and the house has lost its color to an ugly shade of gray. And when he always walked by this place, he could smell delicious food in the air. But with Ash's mom gone, everything was dead.

It was scary.

A raindrop fell on Gary's cheek, and for a minute he thought he was crying again before he felt more raindrops on him. Then he looked up and cursed under his breath. The sunset was hidden behind the dark charcoal clouds and rain was falling more and more.

Gary was not in the mood to be drenched in rain, so his conscience told him to run inside the Ketchum house, since it was right in front of him. He opened the unlocked door and ran inside before the worst could get to him.

It was much scarier inside. Darkness surrounded nearly every corner, and the only light supporting downstairs was a small light from the kitchen. The house was surprisingly clean, or perhaps it wasn't all that surprising if Ash left it like this before his mom left. The house smelled of nothing, which was very rare even on a day that Delia wasn't cooking.

A chill ran through him as he made small steps when he walked toward the kitchen, stopping to examine the pictures that were placed upon the shelf. One was a picture of Ash as a baby, which made him smirk a little. Then the next picture contained of Ash and Pikachu, with the yellow mouse on his trainer's shoulder and Ash's hand scratching his ear as they both shared a happy, laughing face.

Gary then frowned at the last picture. It was a picture of Ash's mom and Ash when he was approximately nine years old. Delia had her arms wrapped around him as she gave a kiss on the head, and Ash was smiling with a tinted blush on his cheeks.

'_What happened…?'_ Gary asked himself. He didn't like change. He believed change can do nothing but bad things. Nothing good comes out of changing.

He didn't even like the way how he himself had changed. Same goes for Ash, and just about everything else.

'_Someone needs to make a time-machine already…'_ He wanted to go back in time so much. Where nothing mattered but being the best pokémon trainer there was.

"Gary?" a small voice murmured from behind him. He turned around to see that the stairway lights were on, and Ash was standing by the stairs, rubbing his eyes and face.

'_He probably just woke up from a nap…'_ Gary thought, but he didn't say anything. Gary also thought that Ash looked so cute when he was half-asleep, when his hair was in a ruffle and when he wore his loose pajamas.

Ash dragged his tired feet in front of Gary and he looked up at him with glassy eyes. Gary noticed right there that not only was he sleeping, but he was crying as well, with tear stains on his face and puffy, red eyes.

Then Ash wrapped his arms around his waist and inched closer to his face.

'_No…not when I feel like this…' _Gary resisted in his mind, but he didn't move.

Ash noticed his slight hesitation. He whispered, "Please…"

His voice was cracked, yet desperate for attention. His lips lightly grazed over Gary's, closing his eyes.

'_Damn it.'_ But he couldn't resist such a seductive yet simple move. Gary wrapped his arms around him and their lips clashed with passion. Gary couldn't help but notice how perfect their lips fit together. Ash's lips felt so soft against his and he couldn't help but nibble on them. The shorter boy moaned softly and Gary felt his hands tightly grip his shirt.

He picked him up bridal style, still kissing him as he made his way to the stairs, and then to his room. He felt like he had to close the door anyway, even if no one was home. It was just a sense of safe confinement for the two of them.

Still holding Ash, the brunette got comfortable on the bed, his back resting against the pillows. Ash pulled away for a moment to change his position so he was sitting on the other's lap. His hands rested on Gary's shoulders as he kissed him again. Gary liked how Ash was dominant sometimes, even by a little bit.

Gary massaged the shorter boy's back, releasing some tension. He felt Ash sigh with ease against the kiss and he moved closer to his body, his arms now wrapped loosely around his neck.

Gary grabbed the hem of Ash's shirt and pulled it off, now softly kissing his neck and collarbone, careful not to give him any love bites this time. He noticed how the raven-haired boy smelled really good, like warm vanilla. He probably took a shower earlier when he went home. He kissed his shoulder before noticing that his shirt was being pulled.

There was just something about their bare torsos touching that caused electricity to run across their veins. Ash stole a couple kisses before raising himself on his knees to unbutton and unzip Gary's jeans. As he pulled them down, he kissed his shapely body, eliciting some breathy moans from Gary. The jeans were completely off of him after that, and then Gary pulled Ash back up to pull off his pants. The two were now only in their boxers, the sexual tension rising even more.

"Gary?"

He looked at his innocent brown eyes after hearing his name being said.

"Do you think we can do it a little bit slower this time? Not to mention, but my body's still a bit drawn out from last night and this morning, but I still want to do it, so…"

His request made Gary laugh silently, and he kissed his forehead. "Anything you want, Ashy-boy."

Ash smiled and nuzzled into his neck before rising to his knees again to remove his own boxers, now completely in his birthday suit in front of Gary.

Gary tried not to stare, honest he did. But he was so alluring, how he could see everything Ash owned on his lean body. He believed he had a more fitting body than most overbuilt guys and even girls. He also had an attractive backside that fit so perfectly in his hands. He snapped out of his reverie when Ash kissed him again, his fingers toying with the waistline of his boxers.

'_Of all people…why did I have to fall in love with this guy…?' _ He finally snapped out of his thoughts and helped Ash pull down his boxers, and now they were both bare.

Gary noticed that Ash wasn't as shaky as he was before, like last night and he was even a little hesitant this morning. Now he was confident and ready to receive anything that would be given to him. Suddenly, the coal-haired boy pulled away from the kiss and grabbed one of Gary's hands. He began to softly kiss every one of his fingers before selecting his middle and ring finger and devoured them in his mouth.

Gary took a sharp inhale of air and bit his tongue hard, almost making it bleed. He could feel his warm tongue circle around his two fingers, and he could also feel his silky mouth tighten around them.

He bit the inside of his lip and resisted every last urge in him to attack Ash and ravage all of his weak spots. But he decided that tonight was going to be Ash's night.

Ash finally let his fingers out of his mouth, and seeing them drenched, Gary took the opportunity to thrust his finger inside his entrance, causing him whine loudly in pleasure. He instantly hit his hot spot, wasting no time for Ash to be teased.

The younger boy placed his hands on Gary's shoulders for leverage, and like the cute little devil he was, he put his face directly next to the taller boy's ear, so he could hear every one of Ash's moans and heavy breaths. Gary almost rolled his eyes in frustration.

He could feel Ash flinch every now and then, and he squirmed a lot, trying to get comfortable with all the pleasure running across his skin. But just as he relaxed, Gary added a third finger, making him groan in irritation but at the same time, he pushed down on his fingers, wanting to go deeper.

When Gary felt like he was stretched out enough, he slowly pulled out his fingers and then settled Ash's entrance on top of his member. He kissed the other's cheek for reassurance before grabbing his waist firmly and lowering him down delicately. Ash moved away so he could sit more upright, and his hands moved to Gary's forearms to keep himself steady.

Ash let out a sigh of ecstasy when Gary's well-endowed girth completely filled him. This was a new position for Ash, so the brunette waited for a sign that it was okay to move on. It was until then Ash started to grind Gary because he couldn't move from Gary's firm grip on his waist. So Gary loosened his grip and helped him move up.

It took a couple slow thrusts for Ash to get used to the new position, but a minute later and he was moaning non-stop, with Gary hitting his prostate every now and then.

Gary absolutely adored the view in front of him. Ash's tiny beads of sweat on his slender body shined from the nightlight, his eyes were closed, but his mouth couldn't close if it wanted to because of the erupting volcano of whimpers, groans and moans. His downy hair was all over his face and nearly covering his beautiful eyes. He looked beautiful even in this state.

Ash opened his eyes and noticed him staring, and a blush crept upon his cheeks. "D-Don't look at me like that…"

Gary smirked. "Why not?"

"Because i-it…it's embarrassing."

"Well, there's absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about."

Ash blushed even more from that comment, his eyes also widening a little. Gary grabbed his face with one hand and pulled him in for a hot, slow kiss. The raven-haired boy moaned into the kiss, feeling Gary's tongue probe in. They tongue-battled for a little bit before Ash pulled away again, grabbing Gary's hands and linking them with his own.

Then he started to move on his own without Gary's help, which caused a shiver of bliss to flow across him. He hated feeling recessive in this case, but he would make an exception for Ash because it felt and looked good.

Ash sped up on his thrusts, biting his lips as he circled around a little bit before he found that certain spot again that made him scream because it felt exceedingly amazing with electric jolts of pleasure running across his veins. Gary was almost jealous that Ash was doing this by himself, making himself shout Gary's name out to the heavens. But feeling his velvety walls clinch and massage around him was definitely worth being recessive for the night.

Ash hit a point where he was feeling too many overwhelming things bubbling in his skin to continue on his own, so he placed Gary's hands back on his hips and his own hands back on his shoulders, but he was still slowly thrusting for he didn't want the feeling to go away.

Gary helped him move, still hitting his prostate with every plunge. Ash was now whimpering, getting closer and closer to his climax. He could feel his member throbbing inside him and he sped up his thrusts again. Gary allowed one moan to escape his throat before biting his lips as he unexpectedly released inside him, with Ash right behind him.

The shorter boy collapsed on top of Gary, too weak and tired to even be on his knees. Eventually though, the brunette got him to pull out, but Ash still wasn't letting go.

Thunder boomed across the house, a storm clearly in motion.

"Maybe you should stay here until the storm passes. I…I'd really like you to stay anyway," he said, his voice cracking a little bit.

Gary looked at him and saw his brown eyes, desperate for compassion. It was clear now. Ash needed comfort. And a lot of it. Gary wanted to help him out of his depression and get rid of it forever. He sighed regretfully when he saw tears roll down Ash's cheeks.

"Don't cry." He pulled the covers over their naked bodies and then pulled Ash to him as close as he could. "I promise everything will get better."

He knew that was a lie and he felt guilty for saying it. But he felt so helpless in front of Ash's tears.

For the rest of the night, all that could be heard was the rain, thunder, Ash's sniffling and sobbing, and Gary's soothing noises.

* * *

**Poor baby :( At least Gary is there to comfort him! He was _very_ affectionate in this chapter :D**

**And as for me MY EXAMS ARE OVER HALLELUJAH. So maybe I will have less stress and more need to write! Woohoo!**

**As always, review your thoughts on the chapter and see you next update! Thanks for reading! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

_What a shame, we all became such fragile broken things; a memory remains just a tiny spark. I give it all my oxygen to let the flames begin._

* * *

Gary slipped out of the bed, being extremely careful not to wake Ash up. He tried not to make too much rustling noises as he put on his clothes. Before he left, he looked at Ash one more time. He looked like a sleeping angel with the morning light shining on him. It was when his heart pained him that he finally left the house.

_**XX**_

Gary simply couldn't work on his research today, no matter how hard he tried. He kept thinking about Ash's face, his eyes, his body, his personality, and everything else that existed in Ash. He also noticed how tired he looked yesterday, physically and mentally. The younger boy was definitely in depression and it had taken its toll on him. He desperately missed his mom and his lifetime partner.

He missed the old Ash. He still hasn't seen his beautiful smile yet ever since they met up again. When he did smile, it was clearly fake and half-assed even in front of his friends. Sure, he was happy to see Brock but the shine in those eyes were now dull.

Ash just didn't have any more determination in him either. He was lazy and had an old soul inside him. Ash honestly believed that he was too old for pokémon training, or probably even pokémon itself. He was surrounded in the magical world, but he brought himself to believe that it was nothing more than a fairy tale. He was too blind anymore to see all the potentials in front of him.

Gary scowled at himself for crying again. He almost scratched himself while wiping the tears away forcefully. He felt like he had to throw up, but he braved it out and tried to focus on his work again on something about a new region that was recently discovered, but not much was known about it quite yet.

But everything was interrupted with a knock on the door. He prayed to Arceus that it wasn't Ash, or otherwise he would have to force himself to kick the boy out. Fortunately it wasn't when he opened the door. Instead, it was Ash's _girlfriend_, Misty.

"Hey, Gary!" She chirped brightly. He hadn't seen Misty in so long that it was weird to see her without Togepi. He made a note to himself to ask her or Ash about where the little egg of happiness went.

"Misty. Surprised to see you here visiting me…"

"Yeah, I know, it's weird, but I just came over to ask you something."

His heart skipped a couple times. _'Does she know…? No way, she looks way too content for something like that…unless she's a really good actress.'_

Despite his nervousness he questioned, "Yeah? What do you want?"

"Well, Brock and I were talking about how Ash didn't really seem like himself for quite a long time and we were thinking of ways on how to cheer him up. And we did, but it's a really huge goal, so we thought maybe we would need some help!"

The brunette raised an eyebrow, but he was interested. "Well, what's the plan exactly?"

"To find Pikachu and Mrs. Ketchum!"

Gary nearly fell on the spot. "W-What? But…do you even have a _clue_ on where they are? I mean that could take years…Not to mention, but Ash is twenty."

"Yeah, I know, but we're also going to ask his other friends too since they're in other regions. We're even asking people we know from the Orange Islands! I mean with everyone helping, we should at least have a high percentage of finding her and Pikachu."

"Well yeah, that's true I guess. But Ash doesn't know about this right?"

"No, we could never tell him and have his hopes up. But just think how happy he would be to walk in his house or waking up one day to see his mom cooking his favorite meal and his Pikachu running up to him and giving him a big hug? I mean that would make his depression go away instantly!"

Gary softly smiled at the thought of seeing Ash in high spirits again. And those tears of his would be of happiness instead of sadness. "Yeah, it would be nice to see him happy. I mean, as his rival I can only tease him when he's at his maximum happiness," he joked a bit, and Misty laughed.

"It would be funny to see you guys fighting like old times," then her voice turned nostalgic. "I _miss_ the old times."

"_Don't_ remind me."

They both chuckled, their minds drifting off a little before Misty talked again. "But yeah, me and Brock would really appreciate it if you could help out even by a little bit. I know how busy you are with your research, but considering that, we both figured that you would know where Pikachu is, at least. Brock said he remembered back in Sinnoh you knew where a bunch of pokémon was, even the rare ones."

Gary smiled as he remembered the whole Shieldon incident with Hunter J. "Yeah, I do have a knack for that, I guess. Sure, I'll definitely help out with that."

Misty's eyes shined. "You will? Oh, Gary, thank you so much!" Without warning, the red-head hugged him. "You have no idea how much this means to me…how it means to everyone. I mean the last thing I want to see is Ash committing suicide, and I'm afraid it's going to come to that if we don't do something soon…"

Misty sniffled and Gary felt that familiar pain in his heart again. He sighed and hugged her back. "I know, Misty. It means a lot to me too. We will get Ash back the way he was. I swear."

She smiled against his shirt, and then pulled away. "Thanks, Gary," and then she smirked. "See, I knew you had a soft spot _somewhere_ for Ash."

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah whatever."

She giggled. "Well, I better be going now. Call me or Brock if you find anything."

"I will, no worries. Bye, then."

"Goodbye."

He closed the door and sat back down at his desk, and he pondered over what just happened.

How much of a chance was there, exactly, to find Ash's mom and Pikachu? If they have both been gone for a year with no sightings or missing reports filled in, then frankly, there wasn't much of a chance.

But karma wasn't that much of a bitch. There was still a possibility, even if there was only one percent of it. If he could see Ash smile again, meaning he would have to drop everything in order to see it, it would be worth it in the end. Definitely.

He pushed the new region research aside immediately and started looking up all the places of where Pikachu could be.

_**XX**_

After taking a numbing shower, Ash dressed in his day clothes, ready to take a walk and leave the soulless house before he realized that he was hungry. He was short of money so he couldn't just get anything while he was out.

He sighed and started to make a sandwich. He got out a cucumber and cut it into small slices, but with his head being in the clouds, he absent-mindedly cut his finger.

"Ah!" He tried to cease the bleeding by putting it in his mouth while he got a paper towel. He almost gagged; it tasted like pure metal in his mouth. He placed the towel on his finger and added pressure on it as he looked for a band-aid or even tape, _anything_ to stop the bleeding. But since he only had enough money to buy food the past year he didn't even bother to buy first-aid kit or even medicine at the least.

His finger was now throbbing painfully and the paper towel was getting drenched in the blood. He couldn't stand the sight of blood. He turned on the sink and ran freezing cold water over his injured finger and hoped it would stop soon. He alternated between the paper towel and the water, and soon it slowed down.

And then a weird feeling ran across him. He felt warm and intoxicated and…relieved. The pain was gone, and it was throbbing still but it was a good kind of pulsation. It was like all of his heavy emotions were flowing out. It was painful at first, but now it was a beautiful feeling, and he didn't know why.

His eyes looked down at his bare, vulnerable arms.

Later that day, he took another freezing cold shower.

_**XX**_

Misty reveled in the sight of the wondrous sunset before her. She was feeling it was beginning to get better now, since everyone was involved in helping out for Ash's happiness. She felt like after everything was solved, her and Ash could finally be a happy couple. The couple that she always dreamed of.

She smiled and closed her eyes and took in the sun's warm rays. And then an autumn wind ran across her skin, making her shiver. She missed summer.

As she walked in her house, she wondered if Ash was busy tonight. It's been a while since the two spent some precious time together and she was certain that Ash needed some comfort. She smiled as she picked up her pokégear and called Ash's number.

_**XX**_

"Hi Ash! I'm so glad you could come over," Misty smiled after opening the door to see her boyfriend, hugging him. He was in a hoodie, which was a little weird since he rarely wore them but it did get a little chilly outside for the sunset was long gone.

"Yeah sure, anything to get out of my house, and uh, well to see you too," Ash told her, and he was relieved that she didn't notice his nervousness right away.

"Aww, Ash," she giggled. "Come up to my room, we can watch TV from there."

The two walked upstairs to the red-head's room, and Ash smiled as he took notice that Misty's room resembled a lot like an aquarium with pictures and dolls of water pokémon everywhere. She also had some photos of her friends and family, and one lone picture of her and Ash, on their first date.

The two settled on the bed as Misty turned the television on, watching whatever seemed interesting to the both of them.

It was then Ash realized this was a night that he wouldn't be spending with Gary. But it was fortunate. He was afraid to see how angry he would get after he found out that Ash harmed himself. The cuts were still fresh and uncovered. He only hoped that he didn't cut deep enough for scars to show.

He wasn't too worried of what Misty would think, but still worried enough. His thoughts were cut off as he noticed the red-head was smelling Ash's neck.

"Mmm…you smell nice."

"Thanks…I just took a shower and washed this hoodie as well so…"

"Well, then that explains it," she smiled. Then she started stroking his hair with her fingers and Ash leaned into her more, enjoying the feeling. "How've you been doing?"

"Okay, I guess. I could be way better though."

Misty's smile turned sympathetic. "Yeah? What's been going through your mind?"

"Just a lot of stuff…I just want to go back in time to where I was happy and nothing mattered but making new friends and catching pokémon…when did it all end, Misty?"

She then frowned, now gently scratching the back of Ash's neck. "It never really ended, Ash. You just need a boost in your life and figure out what you want to do for the rest of your life. Then you'll be set on because you're trying to reach your goal."

He chuckled lowly, "Sad thing is, I don't think I even have a set goal anymore…Nothing just makes sense for me anymore. My dreams of becoming a pokémon master and catching every pokémon in the world…going to a new region right when I hear about it…where did that all go?"

"Again, I don't think it really went anywhere. I think that ambition is still in you, deep inside your heart. You just need to find it."

"I don't know if I even _want_ to find it…"

"Ash…"

He tore himself away from Misty's cuddles and stood up, pacing a little. "Misty, I'm…I'm different. I've changed, and I don't like how I changed. I desperately wish I could just rewind everything and pause right before I went into depression, right before my mom and Pikachu left. Before they left, everything was nearly perfect. Before I changed for the worse, I was happy. I just don't _understand_ why it happened!" He closed his eyes, fighting back his painful tears.

The red-head was already crying. She couldn't stand seeing Ash like this, all broken down and not himself.

"And you know what hurts me the most…even though I didn't tell my mom everything and even though I started to slowly drift away from me and Pikachu's partnership, I thought they would understand. I was a teenager going into a young adult and I wanted to figure out what to do with my life but all that did was force everyone away from me except you and Brock. But my mom's been a teenager before, right? So she had to know what I was going through…so I just can't grasp the fact that she just _left._"

Misty stood in front of him, with Ash's back to her. She chose her words with careful consideration, "Well Ash…some mothers are like that. I mean, your father left for a reason that only God knows what, and so your mom had to take care of you all by herself since you were little. And maybe she didn't go through those problems as a teenager. She taught you everything she knows, including telling her all of your problems so you can sort it out together rather than bottling them up. Your mom loved you, and she expected the exact same love from you, I guess."

The coal-haired boy bit his lip after licking a salty tear away. "I'm a horrible person," he muttered.

"No, you're not…"

"Yes, I am. You have no…idea."

"Tell me, then."

He turned around to look at her. His eyes were filled with tears and sheer sorrow. "I can't…You're not ready."

She gave him a firm, but warm look. "I'm ready for anything. Please, Ash. The last thing I want is for us to break away of what we had all the time…our true friendship. If you want to get better at this, you need to start expressing your feelings."

"…I already have. Just not in the most recommended way."

She furrowed her eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

Hesitant brown eyes met with determined blue eyes. And with shaky hands, he pulled up his sleeves to reveal his self-harmed wounds.

She gasped and backed up into the wall. Her hand covered her mouth from sobbing out loud. The cuts were a fleshy pink, some still a bit red. She counted them, and there were five on his left arm and three on his right. The third cut on his right arm ran across the other two in a diagonal line, and on the other arm, it was five perfectly straight lines in a row.

"_Please…_" she said in a sharp whisper. "Never do that again. I don't care how good it feels or how it lets out your emotions, it is nowhere near the best way to do it." She walked up to Ash, her hands gripping his shoulders. "Promise me now, Ash Ketchum."

His face had on a shocked expression, merely because Misty sounded so much like his mother. With that, he broke down and fell in her arms. He couldn't even bite back his sobs and he let his tears sting his eyes and cheeks.

Misty dragged him to her bed and turned off the lights and the television and held Ash, telling him it will be okay. She showered him with kisses on his wet cheeks and lips and stroked his hair.

But in the end, it was nowhere near as comforting as Gary's kisses.

* * *

**Sigh :( I can't stand making Ash sad! But he is in depression, so...and don't hate me for making him cut himself Dx But I definitely promise he won't do it again xD As for the next chapters in this stories, there are only gonna be like five left! And I don't really have writer's block for this story anymore, so hopefully I'll update the next five chapters quickly! :D And when this story is done, there will be another Palletshipping story up ahead, and no worries, that story will be MUCH LESS angst-y than this one xD And you'll get to see Gary and Ash together more, and a LOT more fluff! I'm tired of writing such dramatic stories, this is my second one in a row! It's making ME depressed. Sigh, but I'm liking where this story goes, even if it is a little short, but I'm known for short chapter stories I guess xD **

**Anywho, read and review of what you thought of the chapter! :D Until next time!**


	7. Chapter 7

_How do you document real life, when real life's getting more like fiction each day?_

* * *

Gary had spent the whole day and night looking up places of Pikachu gatherings. Did he really care that much for Ash? He didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to end up breaking the boy's ever-so fragile heart. He was already so heartbroken from being depressed and to just drop everything was literally risky.

He questioned on how long Ash was planning to do this for. Gary couldn't find one logical answer. He could sense it, too. That the black-haired boy was falling in love with him. It was pretty hard not to be aware of it. He was getting more dependent and acted differently around Gary, not in the usual annoying and somewhat cute way he would act around him. Ash was getting more miserable as the days without his mom and Pikachu went by. Gary warned him about getting clingy, but not too much as to pry Ash away. The open relationship they were in was getting too risky, and he had hoped to create a fresh friendship with the raven-haired boy after finally seeing him after five years.

The brunette was beginning to regret that night when he started it all, when he started giving him pleasure.

He should've stuck with the plan of just being a friend and comforted him, and helped him out in any way, besides lust. But how could he ignore Ash's exhausted, vulnerable body, when it was so willing?

Gary loathed being in love with the boy. But at the same time, he wanted him so bad it hurt. But it just wasn't possible. Ash was not ready, or possibly willing.

He sighed at the stars. He turned off his computer and got ready for bed. He didn't want to see, feel, think or hear about Ash Ketchum. He had to do something to get him off his mind. And his dreams.

_**XX**_

Ash had spent the night at Misty's house, for there wasn't a single nerve in his body that wanted to go back to his house. There were just too many memories there, and too many possible ways to harm himself again. And all the time he felt like he had no idea what to do. He had both Gary and Misty, not to mention Brock there to comfort him through the pain, but he felt like such a burden and he hated that.

He left Misty's awhile ago and walked to the park. He felt sick but he didn't want to go back to his house at all yet. Nor did he want to go to Gary's either, for he felt too depressed at the moment and he didn't want to throw too much trouble at him. He found a park bench and sat down. He tried to ignore the churning pain in his stomach and fought back threatening tears.

He rolled up his sleeves and looked at his cuts. They weren't as red anymore, and a couple were disappearing. The rest were turning into scars, unfortunately, which made his self-esteem drop lower. He scoffed quietly at himself and covered his arms with the sleeves again, shoving his hands in the hoodie pocket.

He looked at the sky. Part of the sky was a beautiful blue, with the sun shining brightly. But in the distance he could see intimidating, dark clouds, indicating a storm soon. He hated storms; they made him even more pessimistic.

His eyes traveled down to the park area, where he could see children playing with their pokémon. His eyes stayed with one child in particular, playing with a Pichu. The child had the biggest grin on his face and so did the yellow baby mouse. They reminded him of his days with Pikachu, back when they were best friends.

'_Promise me one thing, kid…never let go of that friendship with your Pichu. If you do, it will ruin your life…' _He mentally said, hoping that his prayer didn't go unheard of.

Then his eyes shifted to a battle between two young trainers. It made him smile a little. He missed his battling days and he never knew why he suddenly just stopped. He never knew why he let people get to him with them questioning him being a trainer at his age. He supposed because they were cruel to him and made fun of him a lot. He got tired of it. So he gave up his dream of becoming a Pokémon Master just like that.

Then he heard something.

"Oh, mommy, thank you so much! I promise I'll take good care of it no matter what!"

He followed the voice and saw an older woman – the mom, and her daughter who seemed to look the age of just about ten years old. In her arms she held a young Eevee with eyes shining like the stars.

He assumed from the excited looks on their faces that the girl just got the Eevee from her mom.

"You're welcome, my little sunshine. Oh, I just can't believe you're going to be starting your journey by this time next week. I'll just miss you so much."

"I'll miss you too, mom. Don't worry, I promise to call every time I enter a new town!"

"That'll be fine. Now come on, let's go home with your new Eevee. I'm sure it'll love to have dinner."

"Eee!" The brown fox chirped eagerly, making the two laugh. The little girl held her mother's hand as they walked home.

He whimpered as a tear ran down his face.

He changed his mind.

_**XX**_

Gary shuddered and then silently sighed as he made his release inside the girl beneath him. He pulled out and removed the condom from his half-limp length and threw it away in the trash. He plopped on the bed as the girl next to him sighed with content and wrapped her arm around his waist, her head resting on his chest and closing her eyes.

He didn't even know the girl's name. He just went to a local bar and found the girl looking obviously desperate for sex, so he went to her house and granted her wishes. He got sick and tired of Ash being constantly in his mind all day so he used the poor girl as a distraction. She was pretty too, straight blonde hair and ocean blue eyes. But frankly enough, he didn't care about her. And just as suspected, the raven-haired boy crawled back into his mind.

He's gotten so used to having intercourse with Ash, he forgot how a girl felt like. It didn't feel the same, nor did it feel right. He remembered how nice it felt, being inside a girl, all nice and warm and moist. But now it felt vanilla. Ash had given him the best feeling of all time and he gave him so much closure. And he never got butterfree in his stomach and his heart never jumped for joy around a girl, but around Ash, those feelings were strong and evident.

He sighed quietly, and looked at the girl. She was in a deep sleep, which he took the chance to move away from her and put on his clothes. He stepped outside and saw that the clouds were dark again, and he heard thunder in the distance. He rolled his eyes, sick of storms. Why couldn't anything be happy in his direction?

He pulled the hood up on his car and drove home the long way. He had a strange feeling that Ash would be there. He didn't see Ash at all yesterday, and that made him feel both relieved and disappointed. He wondered if he was providing enough comfort for Ash. He wondered if he should be nicer, if his actions should be more passionate, like that one time two nights ago. He loved the way they did it that night. But at the same time he felt like he should've stayed the morning after to see if he would be alright.

Because for some reason he had a weird feeling that Ash did something he shouldn't have done. But he couldn't figure out what, so he pushed the thought to the back of his mind.

He reached his house and pulled in the garage. He turned off the car, but he didn't get out. He kept telling himself silently to not to be upset if Ash wasn't there after all. If he wasn't there then maybe the boy needed a break. Maybe he wanted to stop. Gary half-wished he would stop, so then they could finally form a regular friendship. But he half-wished they wouldn't stop, so they would continue their pleasurable affairs.

'_Why did this have to happen?'_ He thought to himself. _'Why am I such a fool…? And why do fools fall in love? And why is Ash falling back in love with me? I never asked for that to happen.' _He sighed in frustration, massaging his temples.

He still felt bad for Misty. She didn't deserve his blind attention for her. She was a nice girl, after all and she is trying to help Ash.

It's Ash that is causing all the trouble. He's too damn lovable. And he can't make choices to save his own life.

He finally got out of the car, but he stood before the door that led to the inside. He wanted to stop this, and he needed to stop this. This has only been happening for a couple weeks, but it felt like years. His heart felt old and tired of everything that's been happening. Now Gary was telling himself that he needed to tell Ash to stop everything. He was going to do it. He opened the door, leading to the living room. When he didn't see Ash there, his hopes faltered a bit.

He walked into the kitchen, and his heart jumped to his throat, ceasing all of his breath.

Ash was sitting on the counter, staring at him back. His eyes were wide and innocent, desperately calling out to him. He had no pants on, but his intimate areas were covered by a long button-up shirt that he possibly stole from Gary's room. His legs were skinny and bare, and slightly open, and they seemed to be screaming for the brunette's touches.

He was so perfect, and so beautiful.

Gary ignored his good conscience and completely forgot what he was going to say as he kissed him hard, his hands tightly gripping the smaller boy's waist.

'_I don't care,'_ he thought to himself as one of his hands slipped under the shirt, groping his warmth, eliciting a moan from Ash. _'I don't care anymore.'_


	8. Chapter 8

_How could I have burned paradise? How could I – you were never mine._

* * *

Ash's delighted whimpers and moans distracted Gary from his mind telling him that everything was now wrong. His conscience was telling him that it was not the right thing to do anymore, that it will only hurt the both of them even further.

But it felt too right.

Ash's arms wrapped tightly around Gary's shoulders, trying to get as close as possible to him. Gary's grip on the other's member got tighter, and a thumb ran across the head, causing Ash's toes to curl. The younger boy absent-mindedly nibbled on the older boy's bottom lip. Gary deeply groaned and used his free hand to slip under the shirt, caressing the skinny curves that Ash possessed. His fingers slightly stroked the contours of his chest, and also brushed by a single nipple.

He smirked when he felt the goose bumps form on the skin. He used his free hand to undo a couple buttons, revealing his chest. Gary pulled away from their hot kiss and made a trail with his lips from his jawbone down to just below his collarbone. He nibbled the spot and made his mark before his tongue travelled down to the currently perky nipple.

Ash moaned and grabbed a fistful of the auburn hair. Gary nibbled on it softly with his lips before making another mark on his ribcage. He finished undoing all the buttons and Ash's heart skipped a beat when he felt Gary starting to remove the shirt, but he only got it down to his shoulders before Ash stopped him.

"N-No!" The black-haired boy kissed him feverishly again before moving off the counter. He didn't realize how weak his knees were already until he stood on his feet, only to stumble down on his knees. But then Ash was met with Gary's crotch area, and he noticed he was quite hard already, and his groin seemed to be screaming for air and Ash's mouth for it was confined in the brunette's tight jeans.

Ash's hands immediately made their way to unfasten the button and zipper, and pulled down the pants along with his boxers. Ash's brown eyes filled up with lusty hunger at the girth before him, licking his lips. He wasted no time when his hand stroked it, his mouth devouring the head.

Gary inhaled sharply, a moan forcing itself out of his throat. He set his hands on the counter for leverage. His hands were so warm and soft, as well his mouth, so enticing and hypnotizing. Ash sucked him in deeper and moaned, creating a shocking vibration run through Gary's veins. His fingernails scratched the marble countertop, cursing under his breath. There was no way this was Ash's first time doing a blowjob.

He let go of one hand so it could rest on Ash's head, guiding him with his movements. Ash's hand gently fondled his lower area, and Gary's fingers grazed through his hair, clutching a handful of it.

Gary dared himself to look down at Ash's face, and it sparked his pleasures even higher. His face was flushed, his eyes closed at the moment. But then he opened them and the two glanced at each other for a moment, an invisible electric jolt of pleasure forming between them. Then Ash went back to doing his job.

Gary cursed again as he could feel his climax rising soon, but he had no intentions of stopping, not when it felt _this_ good. He started to inattentively thrust into his mouth, but softly, fortunately for Ash.

His free hand's fingernails scraped the countertop and his hand on Ash's head tightly gripped the soft hair and held him firmly in place, letting out an exhale as he finally made his release. But then, just seeing Ash swallow his contents boosted his libido once again.

Ash had gained strength in his knees as he stood up to kiss him, wrapping his arms around his neck snugly. Gary roamed his hands to the younger boy's backside, squeezing it and drawing him even closer. The brunette snaked his tongue in the other's mouth, tasting his essence as well as his own. Ash sighed in the desirable kiss, but wasted no time in pulling away and turning around, resting his torso on the countertop. His derriere was in plain sight for Gary to revel in. He also wasted no time in grabbing his waist and readied his entrance before his member, which was still glistening from the oral pleasure he received.

He made his way in, closing his eyes to prevent them from rolling to the back of his head. This feeling right here, how tight and warm Ash was, it will never get old.

Ash quietly whimpered as he instantly felt Gary pulsating inside him. He then gasped for air as Gary completely filled him. He wasn't making any movements for a while, so Ash thought he was teasing him.

"Gary…! Ugh, _please,"_ he begged for mercy, to fill his body with bliss.

Gary bit back a snicker, but showed some compassion as he slowly moved, but he knew it still wasn't enough for Ash. He truly wanted to ravish him right away, but hearing his sweet and innocent voice beg for more sparked an old rivalry in him.

"Oh my god, _Gary! _Come on!"

"I can't hear you," he said in a sing-song voice, his finger lifting up his shirt and tracing shapes on his back.

"Fuck," Ash almost sobbed, arching his back. The vibration from his girth was getting to be a little too much for Ash to even handle, and he needed Gary to move faster in him already.

Gary leaned over to nibble on Ash's shoulder as his hands wandered around his soft body. He could hear his breaths were already getting sporadic, and he whined a couple of times.

"Please…I need it so bad."

"Hmm…are you sure?" His mouth then moved to his earlobe, feeling Ash tremble under him.

"_Yes!"_

He did one sharp thrust inside him, causing Ash to gasp loudly.

"Like that?" He smirked.

"Y-Yes…"

And so he continued with his fast and deep thrusts inside him. Ash's throat built up a scream, begging him to give him more. Gary obediently followed his requests, gripping his ass tighter and spreading it wider. Ash felt like the air was getting knocked out of him, but he didn't care, it felt way too good. His arms extended out to the other end of the countertop, desperately needing something to grab onto so he could contain himself.

He wasn't even warm anymore, he was hot and velvety inside and it released a monster inside of him, his thrusts completely irregular and messy, and also relentless and _so_ passionate. He had to rest his head on Ash's back; he was getting a little hypnotized from his own actions and from being inside Ash.

Ash was in a complete reverie, his head up in the clouds. Gary felt so wonderful and made him feel like he was in heaven. When he found his prostate, the brunette stimulated it over and over again, and he shamelessly screamed out to the angels. The kitchen walls seemed to reverberate on every sound, making things sound louder than they were supposed to. But neither of them cared if the whole neighborhood heard them.

Their actions went without words, both of them knowing what they wanted next. Ash tried to keep up with Gary's merciless poundings, but with no avail. But it seemed that Gary held him in place anyway, wanting to ravage him fully.

But then Gary had an overwhelming desire to see his face and kiss his lips when he made love to him, so he quickly, but gently pulled out, causing loud protests and whimpers from Ash. He hushed him by kissing him hotly after he turned him around. He picked him up, the raven-haired boy's legs wrapping around his waist as Gary pushed him against the wall. Then he quickly entered him again, watching Ash's face turn into relief. His heart fluttered at the sight and kissed him as he pounded into him against the wall. Ash bit down on Gary's lip and his fingernails scratched his back through the fabric of his shirt.

He pulled away from Ash's lips and made his third mark on his neck, and Ash no longer cared. He let his heart pour out the feelings he had for Gary through their actions. He let out a long exhale as he felt his release coming to a close. He knew Gary was close for he was throbbing like crazy.

And when they released, Gary also poured out his heart, kissing Ash so amorously that the shorter boy almost fainted at the spot.

After they calmed down and stopped kissing, Gary carried the exhausted boy to his bedroom and laid him down, with him right by his side. He pulled the covers over their naked, sweaty bodies and when he pulled Ash into his arms, they were both already asleep.

_**XX**_

Thunder boomed across the house, waking Gary up in the process. His eyes looked over to the boy still sleeping in his arms and smiled faintly. His lips kissed his forehead tenderly, smelling his rain-scented hair. He quietly moved out of the bed, looking at the time. It was a little after eight o' clock, so his grandpa was probably home by now, but in the lab working his research of course.

He took a shower and changed into fresh pajamas and made a note to himself to give Ash some fresh clothes too if he woke up, for it seemed like he was most likely going to stay the night. When he walked in the room, Ash was already up, but lying down and staring at the ceiling. But then his eyes looked at Gary and he lazily smiled.

"Hey there, sleepy-head. How'd you sleep?" He asked after sitting down next to Ash.

"Better than I have been," he truthfully told him. Gary sighed with empathy, stroking his hair.

"You should probably take a shower. I'll give you some new clothes too, okay?"

Ash nodded and followed his instructions. But after he got out of the shower he realized Gary provided him with a short-sleeved shirt. It was too late to get the other shirt; it was in the laundry already. He observed his cuts. The left arm was completely dissolved of the wounds, but his right arm with the diagonal cut across the other two turned into rough embossed scars. Gary was sure to notice them if Ash wasn't careful. He put on the shirt and prayed to Arceus that the brunette wouldn't notice them.

He walked in the room to see Gary changing the channels on the TV with the remote, a bored look on his face. Ash was nearly amused by this. He laid down next to him and quickly pulled the blankets over him, his arms covered.

"Well, there's nothing on TV. Entertain me, Ashy."

Ash chuckled, "How on earth do I entertain the great Gary Oak?"

Gary smirked and moved on top of him, hovering above him. But then he closed whatever distance they had and pressed their bodies together, as well as their lips. Ash wrapped his arms around his neck and enjoyed the moment, forgetting the world.

It wasn't enjoyable for too long, though.

Gary felt some sort of rough texture coming from Ash's arm when it rubbed on his neck. He pulled away from the kiss and grabbed the arm, pulling them both up. There were scars. Gary was half-surprised and yet he half-expected it.

"Did you do this…?"

The look on Ash's face said it all.

Gary pushed the arm away and got off the bed, being completely silent. Ash followed him.

"G-Gary…"

"So am I not enough anymore?" He blatantly asked.

"What?! No, it's not that, I swear! It wasn't my intention to do this!"

"Then, why did you do it?"

"I…I accidentally cut my finger while cutting food and I realized that after awhile it started to feel kind of…relaxing. So I did it to myself, but I regret it now."

Gary looked in the boy's glistening, tearful eyes. He was telling the truth. But Gary was still hurt.

"But you didn't even give me a second thought, did you? Do you know what the purpose of this whole thing was, Ash? I don't want to sound selfish, but I thought I was the one that was supposed to make you feel better, not your goddamn knife!"

"I'm sorry! It was done without thinking, and without a care in the world! It was only until after I did it to myself that I thought about the consequences. Please, don't get mad over this…"

"I'm not mad, I'm offended. If there's anything to be mad at, it's myself."

"…Huh? What do you mean?"

Gary couldn't take it anymore. No matter how good it felt, no matter how much heart he poured out, he had to end it once and for all.

"I'm regretting I ever started this thing. When I saw you that night I knew by looking at you that everything in your life had changed. So I wanted to be a friend to you. But my stupid libido kicked in and I just decided to give you pleasure. And now I realize that I should've never done that."

Ash looked shocked and hurt. But Gary ignored that. He had to ignore all the wants and all the needs for Ash, and that was hard.

"Because now look what's happened. I know without a doubt that you fell in love with me, Ash. You're getting really dependant on me, and I don't like that. What happens when your mom comes back after all? And Pikachu? Just end it and ignore everything like nothing ever happened? Yeah, good luck with that. I told you to not be clingy and I told you not to fall in love with me. But part of that was my fault because I probably didn't remind you enough. But you also should've reminded yourself. Misty's out there trying her hardest to make you happy again and I'm the one doing that. I actually feel sorry for her. She doesn't deserve this, but then again she is one of your best friends besides a boyfriend. But honestly, answer my question. What were you going to do if your mom and Pikachu ever came back?"

Ash opened his mouth and tried to answer him, but nothing came out. Silence filled the room for a few seconds before he finally spoke up, "I guess…just try my best to forget."

"Do you know how hard that's going to be?"

"Then can't we just go back to being friends? Even if I am in love with you after all?"

"But then you'll have to live with the regret of dating Misty but still loving me when you should be loving her."

"God, Gary, then I don't know!" Tears were threatening to spill out of his eyes, but not yet. "But what if my mom never comes back anyway? I mean it's been a whole year since she's been gone. I can't guarantee that she'll come back."

"I can't guarantee it either. But you know…have you even tried looking for her?"

Ash was silent. Gary wanted to choke him right there and then. "Not once…have you tried to look for her…? That's ridiculous. I thought you loved her."

"I thought she loved me!"

"The hell with that! Of course she loves you, she will always love you, no matter what you do!"

"Then why did she leave me!? If she loves me so much, then why did she leave me alone?" He sobbed, the tears hotly rolling down his cheeks.

"I think she just wanted you to clear your head and think about what you really want. And if you could really live alone without her because you didn't tell her anything. Well, guess what Ash, you did a fine job with that!" Gary sarcastically remarked, trying to blink out the tears forming in his own eyes.

Ash rolled his eyes and heavily sighed, "I know…okay, I know! But I thought she understood me…how could she just be gone for a whole year…?"

"I don't know, you would have to ask her that when she comes back."

"You mean, if she comes back."

"No, I mean when. She's still alive on this planet, I'm pretty sure. So she will come back."

"I don't think she will…"

"For fuck's sake, _stop being so negative!_ At least you have a mom! My mom's dead, as well as my dad! My grandpa's withering away as well, and after he's dead, then I have _no one!_" Gary cried. "Absolutely no one. I thought that if I came back to Pallet, and talked with you and got to know you, then _we_ could actually be together! But no, that stupid red-head had to step in and be yours. I've been in love with you ever since the Silver Conference. Do you know how happy I was to see you that night, Ash? I wanted so bad to just take you in my arms and kiss you and just make everything okay. But of course I had to be stupid and make you use me for sexual healing. Well you know what? I'm done. I'm not gonna be used anymore."

Ash's eyes were wide with confusion and his tears were coming down like waterfalls. "S-Since…the Silver Conference? Why didn't you say anything…?"

He chuckled darkly, "I don't think you would've responded eagerly, Ash…"

"That's not true…"

Gary shook his head and sighed, "Just forget it. I want you to stop loving me. It'll be less painful for the both of us, and we can move on."

"What?! I don't wanna stop! Gary, no, I can just break up with Misty–"

"You think I'm going to let you do that? You can't break up with Misty because you want to be with me so badly. Plus, she adores you, and she's trying so much for you…You have no idea."

"No, Gary…please, I can't just forget about you!"

"Just go, Ash. I don't want to see you for a while. Go spend time with your friends. They'll cause you less pain."

"But you're not causing me any pain!"

"Just _go, Ash!"_ He yelled, scaring the smaller boy in the process. Ash took one look at him, with a single tear falling on the carpet as he finally left.

Gary cried all night, his heart completely shattered into pieces.

_**XX**_

Ash ran and ran, his tears not stopping anytime soon. His legs were on fire – he ran through Pallet and Viridian, not even stopping in Pewter City. But then he finally did, in front of the Cerulean Gym. He took a moment to take a breath. He was convinced he was going to have a panic attack. His heart rate was way above normal, and he felt very faint. It was freezing cold outside, not to mention dark and rainy.

He knocked on the doors of the gym. He knew that Misty worked late on the weekends, because of traffic and trainers being busy. The doors opened and he walked in, finally collapsing on the couch.

"Who's there? Huh? _Ash? _What's wrong, what happened?" Misty ran by Ash's side, deeply concerned about his health. He was still breathing heavily, and now he was shivering.

"God, Ash…you're freezing! Did you run all the way here?"

He could only nod.

"But why?"

"T-There's…something I need to tell you," he gulped, despite his throat being clenched up and dry.

"Okay…well breathe first, and let me go fetch you some water."

After about five minutes of getting control of his breath and sipping some water, he finally calmed down, but the tears would not stop. He was more heartbroken than he thought.

"Ash…"

"First of all…let me just say I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you and you don't deserve me at all. But when I tell you everything, just…listen, okay? You can get mad or sad or scream at me after I finish the story…I'm in no mood to argue anymore."

And the red-head listened. And Ash told her _everything._ From the beginning from when he was at the bar with Gary, to the very end when they had that awful fight. As Ash talked more and more about him and Gary, the harder it was to contain his sadness, and by the end of the story, he cried more and more, sobbing out loud.

Misty didn't say anything. Ash was afraid to look at her face. All he could do was mutter, "I'm sorry," over and over again.

Then she spoke up, "Ash, it's…it's okay. I understand why you did it. I mean, I guess I haven't been doing a good job…"

"No! You've been a wonderful friend and girlfriend to me! It's me you don't deserve…you deserve so much better. See, I told you I was a horrible person."

She warmly smiled. "Ash, you're not. Stop downgrading yourself like that…it's not gonna help your self esteem get better at all. And I expected it, Ash. I know we aren't the perfect couple and I didn't expect us to last long anyway. Just as long as I can be your friend, I'm okay with that."

Ash whimpered and nodded, "I would love that…I'm so sorry, Misty. I love you so much."

"I love you too. I just want what's best for you. I can't stand seeing you in depression. Me and Brock will help you through this, I promise."

And so, there was one thing positive for Ash, at least. A great friend, including Brock, who accepted him and understood him. The raven-haired boy hugged Misty, and finally he fell asleep.

_**XX**_

The sun was out today, no clouds in the sky. It smelled fresh and warm, and very relaxing to Ash, who cried all night. He walked back home, taking the faster way out through Diglett's Cave.

He sighed as he passed Professor Oak's house. He debated if he should go in the house or not, but Gary was a dangerous person to be around when his temper was off the wall so, he debated on no.

He reached his house, and weirdly it had a different atmosphere. It was warmer and comforting. It had the distinct smell of a bakery and fresh gardens. Like it had always smelled when his mom was around…

Could it be…?

He shook his head. He was delusional, still. That had to be it. So he walked in the house, and immediately realized that the lights were on. He turned them off when he left the house, and the scent grew stronger. Muffins and fresh picked vegetables. Could it actually be?

He dragged his feet to the kitchen, and there she was.

"Mom?" He sobbed.

She gasped and turned around, dropping her vegetables in the sink. "Ash!"

He couldn't control his sobs anymore as he ran to her, into her open arms. He hugged her tightly, smelling her tender essence. She tried to shush him as much as she could, stroking her son's hair.

He was never going to let her go. Not anymore.

Never again.

* * *

**Wow, it's been a while since I've written a long chapter! And we have so many overwhelming scenes in this chapter, too, I hope it's not too much, hehe. We only have a couple chapters left, guys! I hope you liked the lemon, xD Hmm, will it get better for Ash and Gary? Ash's mom came back, but what about Pikachu? We'll just have to see! Review your thoughts, and I'll see you next time! :D**


	9. Chapter 9

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?_

* * *

Two weeks have gone by ever since Delia Ketchum came back. And ever since then, things have gotten a little bit better. Just a little bit.

Ash could finally enjoy food that was cooked the right way and cooked his mom's way. He could finally sleep better knowing that his mom was back. That she will never leave him again.

She explained to him why she left. It was just as Gary suspected – she wanted him to see how it was like to live alone without a mother's love, and if that's what he really wanted. It wasn't what he wanted after all, and it was never his intention to want that. Though, he could say sorry a million times to his mother and she would accept his apology, but he could never feel right about it anymore. But as long as she was in his life for as long as she could live, he was okay with that.

Unfortunately, there were still no signs of Pikachu. Misty and Brock suspected he wouldn't be too far along though, even if two weeks passed on by.

Neither was there any sign of Gary. His grandfather called the Ketchum house and asked Ash if he had seen him. Not since that night when they fought.

Ash was scared of what might've happened to the brunette. He could only foretell that Gary had gone away to clear his head and just to stay far away from Ash as possible. That made the black-haired boy more sad than scared.

Ash's mom begged him over and over again why he cried every single night even if she was back. After a week, he finally did. She deserved to know what was making her son so miserable. The most surprising part was that Delia actually accepted him. She didn't care if her son was gay or not, just as long as he was okay and happy. She was quite mad at Gary though, but Ash told her to blame it on himself. There was no way that Ash would let Gary take all the blame.

He still loved Gary with all his heart and it pained him to realize that Gary wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

But he would have to deal with it.

_**XX**_

Misty smiled at she picked out some decorations for the party tonight. The reason for the party was that it was Ash's 21st birthday. She knew Ash loved parties and festivals, so she decided to throw him a party in the backyard of the Cerulean Gym. She invited tons of people that Ash knew and the only thing that she wished for was to make him happy, even for a little bit.

She bought the decorations and went her way back to the gym, but then when she was halfway there, she saw something that made her curious and then afterward, shocked.

There was a man with his back to Misty. He was just as tall as her, but he won by an inch. He had wild, unkempt auburn hair, and light sun-kissed skin. It was inevitable – it was _the_ Gary Oak. The brunette that was missing for two weeks and worried every person in Pallet. The one who stole and broke Ash's heart.

She looked both ways of the road before crossing it, her legs unstoppable. When she reached him, she touched his shoulder to make him turn around. And now Gary was the one shocked as well.

Upon closer inspection, Gary didn't seem all that well. He had bags under his glossy, bloodshot eyes, and he seemed as if he hasn't eaten in days.

"Misty…" His voice was coarse and quiet, unlike his arrogant and loud one.

"Oh my god…Gary? Where on earth have you been? Did you know that your grandpa has been worried sick about you? Not to mention everyone else in Pallet, including me and Brock?"

He sighed, "Can we talk somewhere that's a bit less public?"

Misty guided him to the gym, where they both sat on the couch. Gary noticed the balloons surrounding the area. "Are you having a party?"

"Yeah…for Ash's birthday."

"O-Oh…"

"Gary…you have a lot of nerve, you know. I mean, I know you didn't want to see Ash for a while but missing for two weeks without any word is ridiculous!"

"Wait, how did you know that I didn't want to see Ash?"

"…Ash told me everything."

"…"

"We broke up as well."

"What?! But I told him not to do that!"

"And you thought Ash would actually listen? He never listens! You should know that by now. And, it was expected anyway. We're much better off as friends, I mean we're connecting more now, and we would've never done that if we were a couple. And now that we're broken up, you can suck it up and go be with Ash!"

Gary shook his head. "It can never happen, me and him. What happened, it was just a thing. We were friends with benefits. It's not important anymore and Ash shouldn't mope about it."

"You're an awful liar, Gary. It was more than just a stupid fling, you love him and you know it! Ash still loves you too, you know, so why don't _you_ stop moping around?!"

"Yeah, maybe I do love him, but he doesn't deserve me, nor do I deserve him. I've put him through hell and back and he _still_ loves me even now! I'm not right for him, and if he thinks he's not right for you either, then he can go find someone else."

"Gary…why are you being so hard on yourself about this? Ash is crying every single night because of you, because he wants to be with you so bad. He _needs_ to be with you, you're the only person that can actually influence Ash to do things. _You_ were the one that made Ash go on journeys, _you _were the one that made him stronger in battles, and _he_ always wanted to prove to you that he could become so much better. It's you he loves now, and you have to accept that, because he is never going to move on! Not like this."

Gary had nothing to say anymore. Because he knew Misty was right.

"And just so you know, his mom came back. Dawn found her in Hearthome while she was in a contest. Ash would be _finally_ happy if you came back in his life. We could finally see him smile and laugh again…and even more if you know where Pikachu is. Please, Gary, for everyone's sake, especially Ash's…come back. Go back to Ash and hold him in your arms and kiss him and tell him that everything will be okay."

With that, Misty left with the decorations outside, where her sisters were setting up tents for the party.

Gary bit back a sob.

That was the only thing he wanted. To see Ash's famous smile again.

_**XX**_

Ash was at Professor Oak's lab, on the ranch. Training his pokémon. He finally decided to do this as a way to clear certain things off of his mind. He didn't have Gary and his comforting touches, and he certainly didn't want to cut anymore. Not after all the trouble it put him through.

He switched from time to time with his pokémon, making sure that everyone got equal attention. He couldn't help but still feel empty without Pikachu though. Some of his pokémon questioned where his little companion was, and he had to choke down the tears. But then after when he was done training, he broke down in front of his pokémon, because he couldn't handle it any longer.

He felt two vines wrap around him and noticed that it was his Bayleef. He smiled through his tears and hugged her. Bayleef made soothing noises as he started sobbing. His other pokémon surrounded him and made sad sounds, feeling sympathy for him.

Then an unfamiliar presence started to stroke his arm. He opened his eyes and gasped – Umbreon.

"H-Huh? Umbreon?!"

Umbreon looked back at him, her red eyes shining brightly with a tint of sadness.

"Gary didn't…take you? Do you know where he is?"

She shook her head, afterwards bowing her head down in shame.

"Oh…well, that's alright I guess…he'll come back eventually, I hope. Oh…do you miss Pikachu, too?"

Then she nodded, and started to lean in Ash's arms. He smiled and cuddled the pokémon, stroking her soft and tended fur. "I do too, Umbreon…both Pikachu and Gary…"

Umbreon sighed sadly, her heart obviously in much pain as Ash's.

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?"

The professor just happened to walk in on the scene, smiling sorrowfully at the two.

"No, it's okay Professor. We were just…bonding, I guess. What do you need?"

"Well, your mom called and wants you to go back to the house. She has something she wants to tell you."

"Oh okay, well, I'll be off then. Thanks, Professor."

"Sure, no problem. And by the way, happy birthday!"

Ash laughed breathily. He almost forgot he was turning twenty-one today. "Thanks."

_**XX**_

Ash made it back home to see his mom gardening with Mr. Mime's help, which made him smile at the sight. At least things at the house were turning back to normal.

"Oh, hi sweetie! How'd your training go?"

"It went great. It was hard at first because I haven't done any in a while, but once I got the hang of it, it was like second nature."

"Well that's good to hear! By the way, I wanted to remind you to clean up for tonight. Misty's throwing a party for you at the Cerulean Gym, in the backyard."

"Really? Why'd she have to go and do that?"

"Well, it _is_ your 21st birthday, after all. That's a big age, you can do a lot of things now that you don't have to ask my permission for, though I kinda don't like the sound of that…"

Ash chuckled and gave his mom a hug. "Don't worry, you can still tell me what to do. Just don't overdo it, okay?" He winked at her, making her laugh.

"Fine, fine. Now go clean up, okay? She wants you there by six o' clock."

He followed her orders and took a shower. He took the time to mull around a bit, thinking about tonight. He wondered if Misty had some kind of big surprise for him. Such as Pikachu possibly coming back and seeing all of his friends. That would make him happy.

Then he wondered if Gary would be there. The thought itself made his heart race to the point of pain, and he shook his head.

'_I've gotta stop thinking about Gary…if he wants to move on then I'll move on as well, I guess…'_

But as much as he tried to stop thinking about Gary, the memories of them being together, kissing and making love kept crawling back. He realized now that he could never move on. Not from Gary. He loved him too much now. He wanted to be in his arms so bad and kiss him until their lips were numb.

He washed away his inescapable tears in the shower.

But maybe…just maybe he would be there and Ash would finally have the life he wanted. With Gary, Pikachu, his mom and his friends. All together.

That wish may never come true, but he couldn't help but wish, every single day.

* * *

**This update was probably one of the quickest updates I've ever done in a while! -throws a party**

**Anywho, I really wanted to get this done before Palletshipping day which is today, on April 4th! At least in my time zone...hehe. It's a little shorter than most chapters, but it's more of a fill-in I guess, and not to mention but...the second to last chapter! LE GASP! We have one more to go! I'm so excited, only because I want to start working on my next Palletshipping story already! **

**Anyways, please, please review your thoughts! ALSO, please check out my new one-shot called "Versatile" in honor of Palletshipping day! :D**


	10. Chapter 10

_You're here, that's all I need to know. And you will keep me safe, and you will keep me close. And rain will make the flowers grow._

* * *

Fortunately, all of the storms have passed away, making tonight's sky starry and promising, and the air was comfortably warm. Ash breathed into the alluring autumn scent, and smiled a little. He swore to himself that he would try to be happy tonight, for it was his birthday. He had to be grateful to have friends like Misty, whom was trying her hardest to make him smile. He hoped to see some of his other friends there too that he hadn't seen in a long time. He even brought some of his pokémon, to maybe have a battle like the good old days.

It took a while, but he finally got Gary out of his mind. He didn't want to waste his time at the party worrying if he would be there or not. Maybe tonight he'll realize that he should move on and just have fun with his friends. That's how it used to be, when he was travelling the regions and just hanging with his friends. He missed that. He even thought about maybe going back to a region just to relive the nostalgia.

And then if he chose to do that after all, afterward he would decide to plan his future out and find out what he wanted to do. Maybe he'll go back to his old dream of becoming a Pokémon Master. If not that, then maybe part of the Elite Four or a gym leader somewhere. Anything as long as he was happy with his choice.

Tonight he felt nostalgic as he wore his old outfit from back when he travelled the Kanto and Johto regions. It still fit him, a bit snug in places but he dealt with it. He smiled when his old hat still fit him, and just wearing the hat caused his memories to flow back to him, remembering every battle he had and how he won every badge. Within those memories were Pikachu, from the very first day they met. He hoped that Pikachu would come back soon. Or even now would be nice.

He snapped out of his daydream as he realized he was standing in front of the Cerulean Gym. He had called Misty beforehand and she told him to skip going inside and just go around back, and when he did, he smiled at the sight.

There were tons of multi-colored balloons and party tents, not to mention _tons_ of food for him to enjoy. Music was playing from a huge stereo and there were a lot of people there. Some he didn't know, but most of them he recognized on the spot. Then he saw Misty and walked up to her first.

"Oh hey Ash! You got here just on time," she welcomed him, giving him a friendly hug. "Happy birthday!"

"Thanks, Misty. And I really appreciate you throwing a party for me…you know you didn't have to."

"I know, but I haven't been to a party in a while so I thought why not? And you need to have fun in your life nowadays, too. And so does everyone else!"

Ash laughed at the optimistic girl. "That's true. So how many people did you invite?"

"Well I invited everyone that you know plus some more exceptions."

"_Everyone? _Like, from different regions?"

"Yup! And they all made it too!"

"Wow…say, where's Brock?"

"Where do you think he is?" She nodded to a direction, with Ash's eyes following it and then rolled his eyes in amusement. Of course Brock was trying to get a girl to like him at the moment.

"Well, okay then."

For the rest of the hour, Ash spent time mingling with all of his old friends. He got to see some gym leaders, his travelling companions, rivals, and more.

"Hey, so Ash, did you know that the Viridian Gym is open for anyone who's interested in taking the position of the gym leader?" The subject was brought up by Max.

"Huh? I thought Team Rocket owned that gym."

"Yeah but didn't you hear? The leader of Team Rocket suddenly disappeared three years ago and the rest of Team Rocket couldn't handle the organization anymore, and that includes taking care of the gym."

"So Team Rocket is…no more?"

"Seems like it."

Ash was almost surprised. Since his Kanto journey, he had seen Team Rocket every single day. Well, not exactly the whole organization he must point out. He only saw Jessie, James and Meowth all the time. He'd seen Giovanni quite a few times but eventually he was no longer a threat to Ash. And now Team Rocket was over. He almost didn't want to believe it. He wouldn't admit it, but sometimes (only sometimes) the trio had made his days more humorous and somewhat enjoyable. He remembered all the times that Team Rocket saved his life and helped him out. Sure, other days were troubling but in the end they gave in, and let him and his travelling companions be.

Suddenly he heard some voices near the buffet that sounded sickeningly familiar. He looked over to the voices and there were three figures dressed in really outlandish clothing. The man was wearing a fedora with a monocle and a clearly fake mustache with a long trench coat. The woman had her hair up in a tight bun, wearing thin glasses and she had on a long, bodacious dress. She seemed…pregnant? Ash firstly guessed, but then his eyes observed closer and saw that there was a small slit in the dress in the stomach area, and his questions were answered as soon as he saw a familiar paw sneak through the dress to grab a bun.

He chuckled, and excused himself from Max for a moment.

"Excuse me?"

The trio panicked for a moment, staying close together and trying hard to keep up with their disguise.

"Uh..oh, oh! Lookie here, it's the ever-so famous Ash Ketchum!" The man exclaimed, seemingly fixing his monocle.

"Why it is, oh how I've dreamed of meeting you! I've watched you in some pokémon leagues and you're quite the trainer!" The woman spoke up, rubbing her stomach and acting as if she was pregnant.

Ash couldn't fight the smile on his face. "Well, thanks a lot! But pardon me, do I know you guys from somewhere?"

The two exchanged worried looks but still kept calm. "Of course not! Well maybe you have seen us in the audience once or twice but certainly we have never spoken a word to each other!"

"I guess so…were you guys invited here?"

The two were nervously chuckling, slipping out of their impersonation.

"Oh come on! Clearly dat kid knows it's us! We can't fool him anymore!"

"Shut up, Meowth!" Jessie unknowingly caved in but after seeing Ash's confirmed look she shook her head and went back to her disguise. "Uh…I can explain! Uh…the baby already learned to talk while still being pregnant! Haha…"

Ash rolled his eyes and shook his head, fighting back a laugh. "Whatever. You guys are welcome to stay and eat all you want. My treat." Ash walked away, leaving Team Rocket flabbergasted.

"There was no way that was Team Rocket…was it?" Max asked, raising his eyebrow in disbelieving.

Ash just laughed.

"Anyway…I was wondering, you still have some battle left in you?" Max smiled proudly, showing off a pokéball.

"Oh, that's right! I promised you a battle, huh?"

"Yup! So you up for it?"

"Sure, I could use a battle! I might be a little rusty, but I still got it in me!"

"Haha, yeah right," he teased. "Why don't we go out in the field?"

_**XX**_

They decided on a three on three pokémon battle. Like old times, Brock was the referee, and Misty watched from the sidelines. The first round consisted of Ash's Infernape and Max's Kirlia. Infernape got in one flamethrower, fairly harming Kirlia, but the psychic pokémon was able to knock out the flaming monkey with one powerful psychic attack.

But then in the second round, Kirlia was instantly defeated with the help of Heracross's Megahorn, a super-effective attack against the poor psychic pokémon. Max sent out Sceptile, which still wasn't much help against Heracross. Sceptile could only get in a couple leaf blades and a quick attack before Heracross charged up another Megahorn in, defeating the grass pokémon.

Ash was feeling victorious, until Max's ultra ball let out a Salamence.

"Wow, Max…"

"Haha yep! May gave me a Bagon for my tenth birthday, so you can only guess what that means!"

"You mean that this Salamence was your very first pokémon?!"

"Yep, it's my one true partner! Let's show Ash your power, Salamence! Flamethrower!"

Heracross was no match for the powerful fire move, and it fainted instantly.

'_Ugh, I don't have any pokémon that can stand up to a Salamence!' _Ash thought, letting out a short, exasperated sigh. _'Of all battles not to bring my Snorlax or Glalie…I guess…this would have to do.'_

But before he could throw the pokéball, he heard something the distance.

"Pika pika!"

Ash's heart almost stopped. That was…

Before the name could pop up in his head, he felt something run up to his shoulder and then jump off of it. A thunderbolt formed in front of his eyes and attacked Salamence. Pikachu gave it no mercy as it also formed an iron tail and hit its head, causing it to faint.

"Oh wow! Your Pikachu is a lot stronger than I thought, Ash…" Max told him with a surprised tone in his voice.

"P..Pikachu?" Ash muttered with his voice cracking.

The yellow mouse happily chirped and leaped into Ash's arms, snuggling him. Ash dropped to his knees and couldn't help but cry. His heart leapt for joy, and a sob forced itself out of his throat. As he squeezed Pikachu back, he could feel and smell the familiar electricity run off of his fur, causing his skin to jolt. He missed that feeling. It always woke him up more and Pikachu's positive aura always made him power through the day with a smile on his face. Nostalgia hit him hard as the tears came down with more intensity. He felt Pikachu's cheeks wipe away the tears as much as possible, his mewls comforting his feelings.

Misty and Brock smiled at the sight, utterly relieved that their plan had worked after all. "I wonder where Pikachu was all this time. And why did he come back all of a sudden?" Misty questioned, Brock not knowing the answers, obviously. But then he looked over to the short distance, and he saw a familiar figure.

"Why don't we ask him?"

Misty looked at him and then followed his eyes. She gasped, "It's…Gary."

Ash's eyes popped open at the name. He stood up and followed his friends' eyes and saw him. His breath was completely taken away. Gary's green eyes shone in the moonlight, staring at him. He almost had no emotion on his face, but his eyes showed off millions. But he didn't seem mad any longer, thankfully for Ash.

Ash almost didn't realize Gary got closer to him until he picked up his cinnamon scent. The scent that he missed dearly.

Gary bent down a little to scratch Pikachu behind its ears. "Pikachu, if you don't mind, I'd like to talk to Ash alone."

"Pika!" It followed his orders and went over to greet Brock and Misty. Gary then pulled Ash away from the party, towards the cluster of trees.

Ash swore his heart could burst out of his chest at any moment, and he still could barely breathe. He couldn't stop looking at the taller boy in front of him. He looked right back at him, neither of them knowing what to say.

But then Gary spoke up. "I found Pikachu, you know. The past two weeks I…I mean, yeah I wanted to get away from Pallet originally…but then I found a group of Pikachu in an opening of a forest. A lot of them seemed injured, but their wounds were taken care of. I think your Pikachu sensed danger beforehand and wanted to help out. Unlike Meowth and maybe other exceptions, Pokémon can't talk so…I don't know the whole story."

Ash understood though, and it was typical of Pikachu to help out like that. Still, he wished that Pikachu warned him in advance. But maybe it would've been too late.

"U-Um…well thank you."

Silence filled the air again, even if the music was booming in the background. The tension in the air was thick, and you can cut it with a knife. But then a cool breeze caused Gary's serious masquerade to break into pieces, tears slowly dripping out of his sentimental eyes.

"Gary?"

"Just…let me talk…" He rubbed his face away of any tears and sadness and took a deep breath. "Yes, I've loved you since the Silver Conference. After that battle we've had and I lost to you, I've thought about how much stronger you've gotten as both a trainer and a person. And at that point I just developed feelings for you. And even though I thought you deserved my other half of that pokéball we broke, you still gave it back to me because it belonged to me after all. I mean, I did want to tell you how I felt but I was afraid. Afraid of rejection. You were just so precious to me that I didn't want to lose you. You were my only friend, the only one that was there for me. And at that point I knew that nobody could make me happy as much as you."

Gary paused for a moment and observed Ash. He was never a good listener, but he seemed somber about what Gary had said so far. The raven-haired boy didn't even bother to stop his tears falling from his big brown eyes. The brunette wanted to kiss the falling drops away but not just yet.

"And when I saw that you needed comfort, I was desperate at that point and I wanted you so much. The only reason I said I regretted doing it is because I knew it would hurt you in the end. And I never wanted you to fall in love with me through just that. I wanted you to earn my love. So for you to just break up with Misty and be with me just like that didn't feel right. But apparently, you two were scheduled to break up anyway."

"Because she didn't deserve me," Ash interrupted, but Gary didn't seem to mind. "She didn't deserve anything from me because I don't think I even loved her from the start. It was just so I could have someone that could comfort me when I needed it, but then you came in my life and did just that. And I don't know why but I just felt more comfortable with you than with Misty. I mean I guess fate just decided that me and Misty are meant to be friends and nothing more."

"But you can't always rely on fate, Ash."

"Yes I know. But fate will come whenever it needs to come. It comes naturally. I don't think I rely on fate at all, but I accept it when it comes, good or bad. And I just happened to fall in love with you, Gary. Not to mention, but you were my very first friend. My first best friend. And you were there for me too. You were always my inspiration. Once I realized that you made me feel better through your actions I just couldn't help but fall in love. I never wanted you to stop and I wanted you to make me happy again. But I guess I relied on that a bit too much. I never wanted to _use_ you either. I didn't know you felt like that. It was never my intention for you to feel used and I'm sorry. I never wanted to cause you pain and I didn't want you to regret anything. I don't regret anything except for cutting myself and hurting both you and Misty. I just want everyone to be happy from now on.

"And so if you don't wanna be back together with me then, fine…but I still want to be friends. I'll probably never move on, but _never_ seeing or talking to you again could really hurt me in the end. So please…can we just start over? That alone will make me happy."

Gary gazed at him after he finished his monologue. He looked at every feature – his soft yet spiky hair that he loved to run his hands in, his beautiful chocolate eyes that he loved to drown in, his lean, skinny body that he loved to spoil, and his pouty, pink lips that he _adored _to kiss.

He walked closer to him and brought his hand up to his cheek, stroking the tears away. Ash leaned into his, closing his eyes.

"Please, Gary…I'm so tired of being depressed. I just want everything back to normal."

And so did the brunette. He couldn't control himself anymore.

Ash's eyes opened wide with shock as he felt lips on his. But before he could finally enjoy it, the other pulled away.

"Just do me a favor Ash."

"Y-Yeah? Anything."

Gary grinned, "Just start smiling more. Even through the pain and sadness…it'll help. And not to mention, but I really miss it."

And he did, along with a laugh through his happy sobs. And they kissed again. Ash's arms wrapped cozily around Gary's neck as the brunette wrapped his around the smaller boy's waist, pulling him as close as he could. All the times that they've kissed, this was the most passionate and had the most closure. Ash had time to revel in on how Gary was such an amazing kisser. He had such soft, luscious lips that tasted of cinnamon and sugar all the time – he tasted so good.

Gary slyly glided in his tongue, massaging the other's tongue, eliciting a small moan from Ash. The black-haired boy then sighed with ease and he could feel himself slipping away from the real world. In his mind, it was only him and Gary. Sharing their love for each other.

It was heaven.

But then he got his head out of the clouds once Gary pushed him against a tree. His skin jolted in excitement when the taller boy placed his knee between his legs. Ash ran his hands down his torso and then eventually started fiddling with Gary's jean button.

Gary chuckled and pulled away. He looked at him and had to force back an even bigger laugh. Ash was completely flushed and _really_ excited, with a big goofy smile on his face. Gary's heart leapt for joy.

"Not yet, Ashy-boy. Let's enjoy your birthday party first, okay?" He kissed him on the forehead before grabbing his hand and linking it with his own.

They walked back to the party, still lively as ever. The two walked to Misty, Brock and Pikachu, whom were all dancing and enjoying themselves. When they looked at the couple, they smiled, knowing that everything was going to be okay.

"Excuse me? Are you by any chance, Ash Ketchum?" A voice came from behind them, causing them to turn around and see a fairly stout man wearing a suit and tie.

"Yes, I am. Why?"

"I happen to be the mayor of Viridian City! I just saw your battle earlier with that other trainer and I must say, you have a lot of potential, young man! Not to mention, I've been to a couple pokémon leagues where you starred in, too!"

"O-Oh, thanks mister…" He nervously chuckled. Gary let go of Ash's hand and smiled. He could see where this was going.

"Which brings me to this subject. There's an opening for the Viridian Gym, and we've been travelling quite a while around the Kanto region for an acceptable, experienced trainer. And I think you have what it takes to be a gym leader. Are you up for it?"

Ash gaped at the man, clearly surprised. "Really?! You really think I have what it takes to be a gym leader?"

"No doubt about it!"

Ash let out a breathy chuckle, and looked at Gary, who gave him a wink and a thumbs-up.

"Well…of course I'm up for it!"

The mayor beamingly smiled, "Well that is great news! All you need now is to get approved by two other gym leaders and sign some paperwork!"

"Yes! I say yes!" Misty abruptly told the man. "I'm the Cerulean gym leader, Misty. And I definitely say aye for Ash being a gym leader!"

Ash couldn't help but laugh at Misty's enthusiasm.

"I used to be a gym leader at the Pewter Gym, so I don't know if former gym leaders count," Brock joined in the conversation, just as eager as Misty.

"As long as you were a gym leader, it counts! Well, it seems you already have your two approvals, just give me your address on this piece of paper and I'll send all the paperwork to your house by the end of tomorrow!"

Ash wrote down his address and gave it back to him. "Great! As soon as we get the paperwork done, we'll talk about when to start and all! Thank you very much, Ash!"

"No, mayor, thank you!"

The mayor left the friends be, and then Ash jumped on Gary, hugging him with all his might and wrapping his legs around his waist. "I'm gonna be a gym leader!"

"So I heard," he kissed his neck. "Congratulations."

Afterward, Misty and Brock praised him as well, hugging him, and they also announced to the whole party the good news, and Ash couldn't have been happier. Upon seeing Ash this happy, it was a breath of fresh air for Misty, Gary, and Brock. Misty couldn't help but cry for her best friend, and she knew that it would get better from now on.

And after the party was over, Ash and Gary spent the entire night making love, their sweat glistening from the moonlight, their breaths heavy and unstable. Their moans were unstoppable and their kisses were full of love.

They were no longer friends with benefits. They were now committed. As lovers.

* * *

**The end! First off I just wanted to say thanks to all of my fans who stuck with me through this story from beginning to end! I really appreciate it and I couldn't have done it without all of your support! This story has come quite a long way but I'm just glad I finished it before a year passed on by. xD**

**Well, there's nothing left but for you guys to review your thoughts! Also, a heads up, I will be making another new Palletshipping chapter story, so look out for it, it'll be published shortly! The title is '_Helplessly in Love'_****so I hope you guys check it out when I publish it!**

**Thanks again, everyone! :D**


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